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He was always coming up with new ideas of things that he could do, that we could do and I loved him for it. He could tell a story that made you think you were there, that you had gone on the adventure with him and I even imagined what it would be like if I had. I wanted to do them when I was older, I imagined the fun we would have, the things we would do and I couldn’t wait until I was old enough so we could.
I might have if my parents had stayed together. They were an odd pairing. My father was always happy being outside, doing something, seeing what he could explore, while my mother was happier staying close to home and hardly ever went anywhere. She never said anything bad against my father but I could tell she didn’t like him. I could never understand why and it caused some issues between us when I was growing up.
When my mother divorced my father, I was devastated and blamed my mother. She was the one who took me away from him, only allowing me to see him every few weekends. I thought she was using me to punish him. Soon after they divorced he met his second wife, Sunshine, and they got married. It didn’t help that every time I went over to his house, it was to see him playing and giving all his attention to his new stepdaughter, Natalie.
It wasn’t until I was older that I realized my mother did that because she was trying to protect me from him, from his ways. He might have been the cool father who did all the fun things, but he wasn’t good at providing for his family. While my parents were married, she was the one who made sure we had a roof over our heads, food on our table, and clothes on my back. Not my father. He might have been a dreamer, but that was all he was.
I slowly started to resent him and what he did to my mother and me. If he had been a better provider my mother would never have divorced him and he would still be in my life. I spent my teenage years not wanting to see him. I refused to go to his house on the weekend saying I had other things or just didn’t want to see him. He didn’t push but told me he would be around whenever I wanted to talk.
Time and distance helped to mellow me out. It was when I was in my freshman year in college that his television show started to take off. I hadn’t watched it at first but it got such a following that I couldn’t run from it. I found Scavenge a fun and even funny show and while I watched it I started to remember the man that my father was and why I had loved him so much.
It took some time but I came to terms that he was the man he was and nothing would change it. If I wanted to have a relationship with him, I had to accept him and his faults. It was a hard lesson to learn but I realized I missed him and I did want him in my life.
True to his word, he had welcomed me back into his life with open arms. Even offering me a job on his crew. I had school and couldn’t get away from my studies to travel with him but I worked behind the scenes and found that I liked it. I slowly worked my way up the ranks, learning every aspect of the show and what it took to run it.
When I graduated with a communications degree, he had offered me a job as one of his producers. I had gladly accepted. It allowed me to do something that I had come to love and be around a man that I adored and wanted to spend as much time with as I could.
My mother had been understanding. She had loved the man once and couldn’t fault me for feeling the same way. She supported me as she always had but told me to never talk about him when I was around her. I think the hurt of their divorce and her lack of faith in him haunted her. She left him because he was a dreamer and had no money or way to support his family. But after she divorced him, he had launched his show and was more than capable of taking care of his family.
Her resentment was for her to deal with. I was happy to have my father back in my life and a job and a career that I loved. I had worked side by side with my father for almost five years and they had been the best years of my life. I thought I would have more, that there would be decades more, but that hadn’t been the case and now I had to find a way to do right by a man that had been my father, one of my greatest friends, and the man who helped me find my way in the world.
We had never discussed what we would do in the event of his death. It was something that never came up. I was sure none of us ever thought it would happen or it was years off. Now that it was here, I tried to think of what he would have wanted done. How he would handle it, and what I could do to make him proud.
I wanted to think that he would like the pomp and circumstance of it all. The celebrities that were going to come by, the speeches that would be given, the tears that would be shown to the audience when the show aired months from now.
It was important to do right by him, and I just needed to get through the day. I wanted to stay as busy as I could so that I didn’t think about what I was doing or who I was burying. Tomorrow would be soon enough to think, to grieve, to plan, but I couldn’t do any of that until I knew that my father was laid to rest.
He would have wanted me in charge. Only one other person knew him as well as I did and she had decided to be absent for all the planning and coordinating of the event. It didn’t surprise me; she was always happiest just showing up and seeing what would happen. She wasn’t a planner and never would be. She liked to leave that up to me and anyone else who might be willing to do it for her.
I did like doing it for her. I liked helping Natalie out, if for no other reason than it allowed me to be around her. That was another concern I didn’t want to deal with. It wasn’t just the idea of being around my father that had convinced me that I should stay and work on his show, it was also because I wanted to be around Natalie.
Natalie with her huge heart, bright smile, and flaming red hair. She was everything that I wasn’t. I should resent her because she took a job that should have been mine. I never wanted it and admired her for taking it and making it hers. She had been my father’s sidekick and partner in crime since the start of the show more than ten years ago. People had watched her grow up as had I and like most of America, I had fallen in love with her.
She just didn’t know it and if I had my way, she never would.
Chapter 3
Natalie
As far as a funeral service went, it was a lovely one. Full of remembrance, good stories, a few laughs, and even more tears. It was the perfect way to honor a man who had done so much for the community, for kids, and for the world around him. It was exactly what Kevin would have wanted and I could imagine if he had seen any of it wherever he was he would have loved every minute of it.
I had to give it to Jason, he knew how to put on a production and this one was one of his best. When the services aired there wouldn’t be a dry eye on anyone who watched it. It would be the perfect send off to the man we both loved so much. I thought about going up and congratulating Jason on such a good job but it didn’t seem appropriate. I wasn’t sure what else I would say to him so I did what I generally did with Jason, I avoided him.
The after party was held at Kevin and my mother’s house, a sprawling estate overlooking the Pacific Ocean. Kevin had bought it when the show had been picked up for its third and fourth season. It was a bit over the top but it fit Kevin and my mother. They loved to host parties and even did some commentary on the show sitting in their beautiful backyard.
I mingled with the crowd, letting people give their condolences or occasionally sharing a funny story with me. Some even checked to make sure I was okay. Few actually meant it and I felt there were more who were coming up to me simply because they wanted to and could. They wanted to see me break down so they could say they had been there to witness it.
Any crying, any breaking down, any emotions I would have towards Kevin I would never do in front of strangers. I might not have cried for the man but that wasn’t anyone’s business but my own. I certainly wouldn't do it there, not while everyone was watching or with the cameras rolling. I could almost hear Kevin telling me that emotions have their place and to use them to my advantage. He probably would have been happier if I had shed a tear or two but they hadn’t come and he would just have to deal with it. It wasn’t like he could come back and haunt me about it. However, I almost wish he would.
“It was a lovely service, wasn’t it?” My mother, Sunshine, asked as she approached me.
“Yes. It was perfect. He would have loved every minute of it.”
“Jason did a lovely job. The whole crew did. They’ve all become like family over the years, it was so kind that so many of them showed up.”
“They wouldn’t have missed it. They all loved Kevin as much as he loved them.”
“Yes, they did. We never discussed what would happen next,” my mother said and started to tear up.
