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It was as much of an admission of love as I had ever heard. He might not have said the words but I could see that he felt that way when he looked at me. I wasn’t sure what I felt for him. I cared for him but I wasn’t sure if I loved him. There was only one way to find out and when he was looking at me the way he was, I couldn’t say no.
“I’ll give you the rest of the week,” I said.
“Good. You will be staying with me every night,” he said.
“I don’t know about that,” I said. I didn’t like the idea of sneaking around on my mother.
“Let me see if I can persuade you,” Cameron said and brought his mouth down to mine.
Chapter 19
Cameron
The week was coming to a close and I was both sad and anxious about it. I hated having the vacation end. I loved my job but I loved being away and on vacation with my family. This trip more so than any other. The time and week with Sydney had been the best week of my life. I wanted more of it and I hoped I would. I was still determined to find a way to be with Sydney once we left the resort.
I wasn’t deluding myself; I knew how we were when we were on vacation wouldn’t be the same as when we would be home. Sydney and I would have obligations that we didn’t have when we were away. Work, friends, and family would come front and center. It didn’t mean I couldn’t or wouldn’t take the time to be with Sydney.
The last few days had been incredible and also tortuous. I loved being around Sydney. I loved that she came to my room every night or if we could find some time during the day. I loved that I got to get to know her on a level I never thought I would. I loved that we were having fun and this vacation would be one I would remember for years.
What I didn’t like was that I couldn’t be with her, completely, fully, the way I wanted. I wanted to be able to take her hand when we were walking down the beach. I wanted to pull her into my arms and kiss her whenever I wanted. I wanted to whisper in her ear all the scandalous things I wanted to do with her.
I couldn’t do any of those things and I hated it.
Sydney had asked that we not tell her mother and in order to be with her, I had agreed. I didn't like it. After Sydney came to my room the night our parents showed up, I thought we had made a connection, I thought she had seen and understood just how much I cared about her. But I knew it was new and to not push her, so I didn’t tell her what I was thinking and feeling about her.
I knew I could convince her we were meant to be. She had already come so far from when we started the vacation. I wanted to take the time we had for us. I also wanted to show her mother what a great man I was and how I would be the best and only man for her daughter. I had tried throughout the week and had a few conversations with Dawn. None had gone well.
While we were at the pool one day, I said to Dawn, “I really admire and respect what you and my father have found. It makes me think and want to have the same thing.”
She laughed at me and patted me on the hand. “It’s okay dear, you don’t have to be like your father. Not all leopards can change their spots like he did. You are who you are and we all love you. Your father will too, no matter what you do.”
I could see she was thinking I had to change to win my father’s love. I knew I didn’t need to do that. It was her approval I wanted and needed. I didn’t get to say anything more and it wasn’t until later that night that I brought it up again.
“Work is going well. I love it but I’m finding isn’t as fulfilling when I don’t have someone to come home to.”
She smiled at me reassuringly and said, “Have you thought about getting a dog or a cat?”
I couldn’t tell if she was messing with me or if she really was just trying to be helpful. I wasn’t one who asked her for advice or talked about my life with her. I usually did that with my father. We had always been friendly but I wanted us to be closer. She might be my stepmother but I hoped eventually she would become my mother-in-law too. She was important to Sydney and was therefore important to me.
The days had been busy and full of adventure. We had gone zipline one day, taken tubes down a river the next, and then stopped by a tequila factory my father was considering purchasing on the way home. The girls had spent the afternoon going to a jewelry wholesaler and had come back with a lovely pair of earrings for my mother and rings for Alison and Laura.
Sydney hadn’t gotten anything for herself and I wished I had gone with her. I would have found something for her. I would have loved to have picked out a diamond ring for her and considered taking my father there to get one. Unfortunately, we had run out of time and I hadn’t been able to come up with a good excuse for why I needed to run off with my father alone. Plus, if I did it would have meant I had less time with Sydney and I didn’t want that.
There was very little time that we had to ourselves. Alison, Laura, and even my father were good about giving excuses for me to steal Sydney away. They were the best conspirators that I could have asked for. I was sure the reason I had any time during the day alone with Sydney was because of them. But it wasn’t enough, I wanted more.
Any time we had together was spent in my room. Our love making was fierce and exciting. I felt freer with Sydney than I had with any other woman I had been with. She made it easy to tell her what I wanted, what I liked that she did, and the results were incredible. I was sure it was because we had such a great history together that it made our relationship that much stronger.
But the vacation was coming to an end and I wasn’t any closer to convincing Dawn that I was the right man for Sydney than when she arrived. I thought about just telling her flat out how I felt about Sydney and what I wanted for our future. She was an insightful and clever woman; she might like that I gave her the direct approach about her daughter.
I wanted to ask Sydney about it but anytime I started to bring up her mother, she would stop me and say she didn’t want to talk about it. I wasn’t sure if it was because she didn’t want to think about her mother objecting or she didn’t see the need to have the conversation as she still thought we would be done when we left Cancun.
If I could convince Dawn that I was the right man for Sydney I knew I could convince Sydney too. I just wasn’t sure how to go about doing it. I was still thinking about it when the six of us were having dinner on the second to last night. I was seated next to Alison as we watched flamethrowers do a show for us. Sydney was next to her mother on one side and Laura on the other. Dad was seated next to Alison. I was about as far away from Sydney as I could get and it bothered me.
“You need to stop glaring over at Sydney. She’s going to think you’re mad at her,” Alison said.
“She knows I’m not mad at her. I’m mad at the situation and that she’s so far away from me. I hate that the only time I get to touch her is when we’re alone. I can’t wait for us to be home and I can be with her more.”
“Do you honestly think that will be the case? What with work and everything else you two have going on? Don’t forget the fact that you live and work in two different cities.”
