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“You’re not asking me to do anything hard, Torin,” I tell him, my voice gentler. “You’re just asking me to love you out loud. And I can absolutely do that. I’m more passionate about you than I am about the farm, and you know how I feel about that.”
Jonah moves in behind Torin. I hadn't even realized he and Linnea were in the room.
He puts a hand on Torin’s shoulder. "Let her," is all he says.
I pull Torin's hands away from my face. "It'll be fine."
“Okay,” he finally says. Clearly, he’s still reluctant. “But if you don’t want to talk, you don’t have to. Just be there beside me.”
We step to the doors, I'm smiling brightly, and then…I see the crowd.
The amphitheater is just off the main square. There’s a wide stage between us and the crowd, but the crowd is huge. They’re all going to be looking at me. Listening to me.
And the nausea hits me hard.
I turn to Torin. "I'm going to be sick.”
And he reacts as quickly as he did that first time at Ellie's. He drops to his knees, yanks one of my boots off, and shoves it in front of my mouth, just as I throw up.
When I'm finished, I stare in horror at the boot.
He shrugs. "It was the only thing close enough and big enough."
"These are my lucky boots.”
“Yep, really lucky they were here or that would have been quite a spectacle.”
I glance at the crowd. That’s horrifying. I blow out a breath. “You are so buying me new boots," I tell him.
He truly grins for the first time since I met him on the path outside. "As many as you want, Princess."
Linnea shoves a water bottle at me, which I gratefully accept. After I drink, she hands me a breath mint. Wow, she is really a handy person to have around. Then I grab Torin’s arm and balance on one foot as I take off my other boot.
I take a deep breath.
Then say, “I need a minute.”
Torin doesn’t look a bit surprised. He steps to the side and I rush back into the room behind the stage.
I press my hand to my stomach. Oh my God. I just threw up in front of all those people. I cover my face. Great. Just great. I was prepared to show Torin, and myself, that I could do this and now…ugh!
I can hear the noise of the crowd and it’s rising as they all realize we’re not coming right out, so I head for the back door of the amphitheater. I just need another minute to gather myself.
As soon as my hand hits the door, my eyes slide shut. I push the door open and slip outside, pressing myself against the side of the building. I take a deep breath. I don't need to puke again. This will pass. I need to get over this. I don't have to talk. I just need to stand there next to Torin.
You're fine, you're fine, you're fine. I just keep repeating the words over and over.
Until I hear a little voice say, "It's the Princess, Mommy!"
My eyes fly open, and I see that not only is there a little girl staring up at me, but there's a whole group of people staring at me.
Apparently, some of the crowd has gathered along the side of the building and wrapped around the back. And I'm standing right in front of them, pressed against the side of the building like an idiot. A quick glance tells me there are about thirty women and children.
I’m not great at judging ages in children, but the girl is probably about five. I give her a smile. "Um…hi."
Her eyes go wide as if she’s shocked that I can speak.
"Mommy, it's the Princess," she repeats in a stage whisper. She grasps for her mother's hand without looking.
