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Before I can process what he said, his lips are on mine, firm and demanding. And I’m lost. I open for him, losing myself in the moment before he pulls back. His eyes glitter with something that makes me want to slap him.
“No. He kisses me like he loves me, not like he has a point to prove.”
My words hit home, and he sucks in a shocked breath. “No.”
“No, what? No, he can’t love me because you think I’m yours?” I snap, feeling stupid and small.
“No. I wasn’t kissing you to prove a point. I was kissing you because I need you to remember what it’s like to love me. I need you to let me love you back. I know I don’t deserve it. I’ll spend forever making it up to you, but I need you to remember that not everything we had was bad. I fucked up. God, me and Hawk, we destroyed the one good thing we ever had because of our hang-ups, but don’t let our mistakes wipe out all the good memories we made together.”
“You tarnished them. Every happy memory leaves me questioning whether it was all just a lie. Was it all a trick to get me where you wanted me?”
He growls again, his hand sliding into my hair. “The second you let me slip inside you, I knew I was keeping you forever. Even if I got kicked out of the country and my citizenship was denied, I was taking you with me. Our wedding was for the green card, but our marriage was all for us. I want a lifetime with you. I always did. I just need you to forgive me.”
Truth.
I’m full-on crying now. I couldn’t say anything, even if I tried.
But he’s right. If I take away the last moments of our relationship, I was the happiest I’ve ever been when I was with them. And right now, I don’t know how to reconcile that with the hate I’ve let eat away at me.
Chapter Twenty-Four
Creed
I hold on to her as she cries into my shirt, afraid to let her go in case this is the last time she lets me touch her. When her weight presses more heavily into me, I scoop her up and move to sit on the sofa with her in my lap, my arms wrapped tightly around her.
She lifts her head. Her eyes are red, her cheeks damp, and her lips puffy, yet she’s never looked as beautiful to me as she does right now.
“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to fall apart.”
“Don’t be. I think it’s been a long time coming,” I tell her, brushing my thumb across her cheeks, wiping away the remnants of her tears.
Looking into my eyes, she’s quiet. Her brows furrowed.
“Tell me what’s going on in that head of yours.”
“I would if I could make sense of it all.” She tries to slide off me, but I grip her tighter.
“Creed.”
“Just let me hold you for a little while longer.”
“You act like I’m going to disappear.”
“Aren’t you?”
She blows out a frustrated breath and glares at me.
“It wasn’t my fault the first time I disappeared.”
“No, it wasn’t. It was mine for not searching for you. But that will never happen again. If you leave, I’ll follow.”
“It’s not the same, Creed. We’re different people now than we were back then.”
“Good. Maybe we can learn from our mistakes this time.”
“I can’t—” She shakes her head, but I lean down and capture her mouth with mine. Kissing her slowly before pulling back.
“You can. You’re just scared. I get it. I am too. But if I let you go now, I’ll regret it for the rest of my life.”
