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CHAPTER 22
JOSH
Sitting at the bar, I nurse my second beer and stare at the liquor bottles on the shelf. Erin hasn’t texted or called all day long, and her silence is just confirmation of what I already knew.
That big-city doctor is done running around with a podunk cowboy like me.
I thought I had something special with Erin. I never expected her to come back into my life, but from the moment we had that first date, being together has felt right.
But now, it seems like all of that is over.
I don’t know what I was thinking, assuming that the long-distance thing would work out. Her telling me about her new job was, obviously, her way of letting me know that she was about to become too busy for me.
And I know how things go when the person you’re dating starts talking about being too busy. It’s not long after that when they just call the whole thing off.
I take a long swig of my beer, draining half the bottle. I can’t believe I let myself get so attached to her. I should have known better.
But it’s not like I can blame her for wanting more than what I can offer. Erin is a successful doctor in a big city; she can have anyone she wants. If she stayed with me, I would just drag her down.
And yet, even as I sit here drowning my sorrows, I feel a creeping sense of regret. Maybe I should have fought harder for her. Maybe I should have shown her that there’s more to me and this town than what she thinks.
But it’s too late for that now.
I take another swig of beer and try to push the thoughts out of my mind. It’s not like I’ve never been rejected before. But with Erin, it feels different. It feels like she was the one who got away, and I can’t help but wonder what could have been if things were different. If I was different.
My thoughts are interrupted by someone clapping me on the shoulder.
“What’s up, man?” Sam takes the stool next to me. “Where’s Erin?”
I scowl and look away. “Don’t know.” Even hearing her name makes it feel like my heart is being ripped from my chest.
“Uh-oh.” Sam turns on his stool to face me. “What happened?”
“She got some new job. She’s gonna be running her own practice or something, and so she’ll be too busy for me.” I take another swig, but it doesn’t wash away the bitterness.
Sam gives a low whistle. “That sucks, man. I’m sorry.”
I shrug, not wanting to make a big deal out of it, even though it feels like I’m dying. “It is what it is. I should have known better than to think it would work out.”
Sam nods in understanding. “And that’s just it? There’s no working it out?”
I turn and stare at him. “What am I supposed to do? She doesn’t want to be with me.”
“That’s what she said?”
“Well, no, but… that’s what she was about to say. I left before she got it out. I at least have some pride.”
Sam bursts into laughter. So much laughter that he actually slaps his palm on the bar.
“I’ll take one of what he’s having,” he tells the bartender while pointing at me.
“What?” I grimace. “What are you laughing at?”
Sam shakes his head, still chuckling. “You, man. You just assumed what Erin was gonna say.”
“I knew what she would say,” I point out.
He gives me a look like I’m the biggest dummy in the world. “Look, dude. I’ve known you since we were teenagers, and while you’ve grown in a lot of ways since then…”
