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As I climb into bed, I feel a twinge of excitement mixed in with the fear and uncertainty. This isn’t how I planned my life, but maybe this is the universe’s way of telling me that I need to slow down and focus on what really matters. Maybe being a mother is what I’m meant to do, and I can still be a successful doctor too.
With those thoughts in my head, I drift off to sleep with a sense of peace. What’s coming next will be a rollercoaster, but I’m ready for it.
Still, I can’t help but shed a tear over Josh. I had dreamed of having him by my side for this kind of event, but it looks like that won’t be happening. Despite the hurt and anger I feel towards him, a small part of me longs for his comfort and support.
Maybe one day I’ll find a man to build a life with. Until then, I’ll do what I have to — for myself, and for my child. I’ll give him or her the best life possible, and I’ll forget all about Josh Humphries.
Somehow.
Some way.
CHAPTER 24
JOSH
“Good boy, Chip.” I pat the Australian cattle dog on the head, and he wags his tail at me.
It’s been another long day on the ranch, and thanks to Chip and the other dogs, the cattle are all safely munching on dinner.
The horses are shut away. The chickens are in their coops. The barn cats are lazing in the setting sun. My staff is heading back to their houses in town or the cabins they live in here on the ranch. There’s nothing left for me to do.
I used to long for this part of the day, but now I hate it.
There’s nothing to look forward to. Just long nights with myself in my too-big, empty house.
Well, myself and memories of Erin.
They haunt me like nothing else. It seems I can’t go a minute without thinking about her.
The worst part is that there’s nothing I can do. I screwed up, and I’ve lost her for good.
Which is probably best for her. I’m not the kind of guy she was destined to end up with anyway. One day she’ll marry some fancy doctor or lawyer, and she’ll forget I ever existed.
And I’ll still be here, spinning my wheels, doing the same old same old.
Pulling off my work gloves, I head for the house, my chest heavy. The sound of a truck coming up the drive makes me turn around, though.
It’s Sam, his arm hanging out his window and a big, goofy grin on.
“Guess what?” he shouts before he even gets out of the car.
I shrug. I don’t know what, and honestly, I don’t really care. I want to be left alone to wallow in misery with my microwave dinner and bad reality TV.
Sam strides over to me. “The sale on Fletcher’s Pond has been canceled.”
I stare at him. I’d forgotten all about Fletcher’s Pond. Heck, I didn’t even bother going to the last meeting.
“It has?”
He nods and claps me on the shoulder. “Thanks to you.”
I shake my head in amazement. I had hoped this would happen, but I wasn’t holding my breath by any means.
“It wasn’t just me. It was the whole team.”
Erin included, but I’ve made it a rule to never speak her name.
Sam chuckles. “Yeah, yeah, I know. But you were the one who convinced everyone to speak their minds.”
