AllFreeNovel
Share Us
Guilt crushed her soul, growing bigger with each beat of her heart. She strode to the window near the drawing-room table. Like the one by the bed, the view was of a luscious tree at sunset. Folding her arms, she tried to stifle her temper. It was her instincts fighting to keep her afloat, to save herself from more misery by blaming Jace.
“What?” Leaf came to stand behind her. He swiped her hair to one side of her shoulders and lowered his lips to her bare neck. Their gazes clashed in the window’s reflection. He was the face of the man she failed, the man she caused great suffering, and the man she didn’t fight hard enough for… but she’d lost her chance to apologize for any of it.
“Leaf,” she said to his reflection, “it took the world ending for us to reunite. Jace blamed himself for the distance that grew between us, but I could have fought harder. My brother caused all this pain, and I let him. I saw the signs and did nothing. I’m not this saint he made me out to be.”
He rested his chin on her shoulder and his hands on her hips. “He remembered you the way lovers do.”
“But I cry. I cuss. I shit just like anyone else. I’m not perfect, and… for him to wait so long for me like that… I’m…” She choked up, almost not wanting to voice the rest, but it came out anyway. “I’m glad he gave up. I’m glad he chose to wipe all that suffering away and start again. I loved him, but I wasn’t perfect. If he met me now, with all those memories, he’d be disappointed in the reality.”
Leaf sighed, and his mind went somewhere else for a while. Somewhere caught between the tree outside and the doubt swirling in his heart.
“So I won’t read the journals,” she announced. “I don’t want to pollute my memory of Jace with the madness you said he eventually suffered. He had private thoughts I’m not sure were meant for me. He deserves to be remembered as the best version of himself.”
“He wasn’t mad,” Leaf said quietly. “He was on his way but not insane yet.”
“Can we… talk about something else? I want to move on with my life. Here. With you. With these people. I’m okay to meet them. And I’m ready to tell them about Niles.”
“You don’t have to do anything you don’t want to,” he mumbled, distracted.
Desire curled through their bond, heating her lower abdomen. In the reflection, Leaf stared with hot eyes as he traced idle patterns over her hips, bunching the shirt to reveal her thighs. He didn’t realize she was watching him until she felt a bolt of lust and eagerness. He looked up. Their gazes clashed. He stepped back and cleared his throat.
“You are wearing my shirt,” he noted.
She frowned. Why did he change the subject so swiftly? She faced him. “Your scent comforts me.”
“But you’re thinking of him.”
She reached up and tugged his collar. “Does it matter?”
Despite his body language saying he wasn’t interested, his desire flared when her fingers brushed his skin. And not just through their bond. She traced down the center of his jacket, popping studs to access his linen undershirt. The path of her fingers mesmerized them both.
Pop—she revealed a little more shirt.
Pop—their breathing shallowed.
Pop—she unlaced his shirt and glimpsed a defined, flat abdomen.
Pop—Leaf’s steel grip wrapped around her wrists.
A warning flashed in his eyes.
“Has something changed?” she asked softly. “I thought you wanted this. We’re mated now and…”
“You should take time to adjust,” he said, voice far too husky to refute the desire scorching through their bond.
“No puedo creer mi suerte. Que tengo una pareja tan terco y tan estúpido que no puedes ver lo que está enfrente de tí. No sabes todo, Hoja.”
His brow knitted adorably in concentration. He cocked his head, blue eyes darting between hers. “Did you just say that you can’t believe your luck to have a… stupid mate who can’t see what’s right before you?” He blinked as more understanding came to him. “And then you said, ‘You don’t know everything, Leaf.’”
“¡Ay Dios!Can you understand me? Have you remembered?”
“No, I haven’t remembered. But I somehow understood.” His surprise darkened to anger. “Is this the sort of thing you’ve been lecturing me with all these times?”
Heat crept up her cheeks. “Well, in my defense, you do act arrogantly and stupidly. I can’t help it if I need to get this frustration off my chest.”
He let go of her wrists. His gaze dipped to her freckled cheeks. “Maybe our bond is deeper than emotion. There have always been rumors Well-blessed mates can share thoughts, but I’ve never seen it.”
“So you know, then, Leaf of the Guardians. You know I do not want more time alone. I want to be with you. And if it is not me holding us back, then it is you. So spill. Why do you deny me now? Are you afraid I will think he was a better lover than you?” She folded her arms and raised her brows.
