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I try to swallow the growing lump in my throat. Nora starts blinking really fast, and I don’t need her tears right now.
She smiles, pulling me into a hug and squishing Ax between us. “Go be so freaking happy. Walk on sunshine and write sappy love songs that drive us sad, lonely singles crazy with jealousy.”Her tone softens. “There’s no one that deserves it more than you. And Sean deserves it, too.”
I hug her as tightly as possible, swallowing down my tears.
“I’m coming to visit as soon as you want me to, and I’ll stay however long you want or maybe longer. Gem’s already looking at long-term rentals.”
I laugh, running a finger under my eyes as my Gem comes strutting down the sidewalk with a young airline employee in tow.
“Break it up, you two. She needs to get her buns in there, or she’ll miss her flight.”
Gem directs the kid, showing him what needs to be checked and demanding he line up someone to help me once I land in Phoenix.
Nora’s smiling eyes meet mine at Gem’s assertive dictation. When she’s done, the kid looks dazed and overwhelmed but is shocked back to life when she hands him a generous tip with a wink.
She swiftly wraps her arms around me. “It’s time, baby girl. I’ll see you in a couple weeks.”
“Oh, really. I heard you’re already looking for a rental.”
She doesn’t meet my eyes. “I’m just doing a little shopping.” She kisses Ax’s head, and a faint red lip print remains. “You call me as soon as you get settled in your hotel and make sure you line up a car to take you to the game tomorrow. I’ll send you the information Ed McNeil sent me to get you into the stadium, and someone will be there with your field pass.”
I nod as my stomach flip-flops with the thought of surprising Sean. “I still can’t believe he was able to get me a ticket.”
She rolls her eyes. “Honey, that man only had to make a phone call. He hated to see Sean leave, and he adores you, so this was an easy favor. Besides, he owed me one.”
I hug her. “Are you sure I’m doing the right thing? This is really big, Gem.” I hug her tighter, choking on air. “I’m terrified,” I whisper because any louder, and my anxiety will consume me.
She pulls back, holding my face in her hands. “Nothing. Absolutely nothing in this life ever worth having comes without fear. You are the bravest person I know. You love him, and he needs to know that. It’s time. It’s time for you to stop fighting the world and just go for it.”
I bite my lip, hiding a teary smile. She’s right. It’s time.I can do this.I can go for it because I know at the end of this Sean will be there. Even though I might be more terrified than I’ve ever been in my entire life, I somehow know it’s all going to turn out ok.
I nod to the kid, and he pushes the cart toward the sliding doors as Ax, Snipe, and I follow. I turn for one last look over my shoulder at Gem and Nora standing there, arms linked with giant, smug grins on both of their faces.
I take a deep breath and hold it, trying to strangle my fear and suppress my tears. One lonely droplet escapes as I walk toward what I really hope is the rest of my life.
Chapter 55
SEAN
“Greyson. First game as a King. Let’s go!”
One of my new teammates slaps me on the back as he walks past while I tighten the straps on my shoulder pads.
The last thing I want right now is more pressure surrounding my rib cage. Droplets of sweat cover my brow as my stomach clenches uncomfortably tight, working itself back into my esophagus. My nerves are so far on edge that if I don't get out on the field soon, they'll start flinging off one by one, and I’ll end up hanging over the toilet again.
My mind is swimming through the sludge of too many thoughts and emotions. I’ve tried everything since last night to get focused, but every time I’m almost there, her name pops into my head like a mallet to a gong.
I tried calling last night, needing to hear her voice and have her tease me like only she does. It’s calming and a reminder that she hasn’t left me yet, but she didn’t answer and hasn’t called me back.
I keep trying to tell myself it doesn’t mean anything. Then, the past rears its ugly head to remind me that hope is fleeting, and I should see it as a giant yellow caution sign to plan for the worst.
I pull on my jersey, the number twenty-four my only familiar comfort. It’s been my number since the beginning, and I was fortunate to be able to keep it. Grabbing my helmet, I join my new team as they file onto the field for pregame drills.
I find my trainer and space, ignoring the roaring fans. I run a couple routes, trying to get used to the feel of the turf under my cleats and making sure I can gain traction. I pause to catch my breath, feeling the warm sun on my face and the cool breeze against my sweat.
I stop and pull my helmet off, taking a moment to close my eyes and ready myself to do what I was brought here to do. I think about what Shane said. It’s game time, and this is what I love. So I’ll play this game and then do whatever I have to afterward to ensure I don’t lose Andie.
I take some deep breaths, working to clear my head of all the noise and remove the hand that’s been around my neck all morning. The beat ofHappyfills my mind, and a smile wants to tug at my lips, but that grip on my throat chokes it out.
