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Do we? Because I’m feeling a hell of a lot like I’m all sorts of confused.
That strong masculine jaw mocks me, and I really consider asking him what exactly is up with the way he’s looking at me. It seems like he knows something I don’t, making me feel like my entire body is entering an inferno.
Like he can see straight through me, he reaches to push a curl out of my face, and I sit perfectly still and let him.
“Hey, it’s just me. The guy you don’t like very much.”
The spot where his fingers brush against my skin prickles with life. I inhale and exhale, slowing my mind and body’s roll. “If only these people knew just how much I don’t like you.”
He laughs, and I smile, feeling myself return from the brink of panic. He turns onto the road, and the only sound filling the space is the rumble of the engine. Although he doesn’t seem to mind the silence, it’s about to eat me alive.
The way Sean looks at me, and how he seems to see everything, I don’t want him to. The way he smells and how good he looks. All that garbage Gem and Nora have been feeding me is just too freaking much, and I’m letting it get to me. Far inside my head, I jump in my seat when he speaks.
“Can I ask you a question?”
“Suuureee.” Although, I’m not really sure at all.
He glances at me and smiles, and I want to tell him to wipe it off his pretty face. There’s no room in here for that tonight.
“What Nora said about the label execs…I assume she was talking about record labels.”
Business. I can talk business all night long, and that will put us right back on our strictly professional relationship.
“It seems some of the labels I work with want to sign me to capitalize on the publicity we’ve been sucked into.”
That little crease between his eyes appears. “I don’t understand.”
“I met with a label a few weeks back to showcase some songs for a new artist. They spent the majority of my time there talking about you and me. I, of course, kept my answers vague, trying to move the meeting forward, but I should’ve known. Jonesy got a call from one of the execs wanting to know if he thought I’d be interested in signing with them.”
He cuts in. “Why’d they call him?”
“That’s what I wanted to know. They knew I’d say no. I think they hoped Jonesy would somehow convince me to take advantage of thisopportunity.”
“What opportunity?”
“The media spectacle that you and I have become. Good or bad, the press is all over us, and they see dollar signs attached to it. If I want to make it big, why not jump on this bandwagon and ride it into the sunset? You, big guy, are just an added bonus to the whole sweet deal.”
He stops at a red light and turns toward me. “So you’re saying they want to sign you because they can use the negative press to sell records?”
“Sean, you know as well as I do that some people don’t care about what we are or aren’t doing. If they can make a buck off of it, off of us, nothing else matters.”
“I’m sorry, but that sounds messed up.”
I laugh. “Uh, you think? Even worse is that I’ve worked with some of these guys for a long time. They know I won’t sign, and I’ve made it clear. I didn’t expect them to sink this low. I’m not sure I want to work with them anymore.”
“So what are you going to do?” he asks the question softly, like he’s genuinely interested in my thoughts.
“Jonesy and I are thinking about branching out on our own. I’d get to sing my own songs and put out an album but not have to sacrifice myself in the process. I’d get to tell my own stories and have them be heard the way I wrote them.” I pause. “If we’re successful, maybe other artists would want to work with us.”
“Are you going for it?”
I look out the window at the passing lights. “I’m thinking about it. It’s a big risk, and I have Ax. No longer handing my songs over to others would be a real perk. I’d get to be in control. Nora thinks it’s possible based on the following I’ve gained since singing the anthem, and you and I started our secret love affair.”
Sean is quiet for a long minute, like he’s taking it all in. “I’m really sorry about all of this.”
I put my hand up to stop him. “Stop apologizing. You didn’t do this. Any of it. Who knows, maybe this will be something else good that comes from it.”
He glances at me again, and I can’t read the look on his face. His blue eyes have a seriousness about them that’s different, causing my lungs to momentarily malfunction.
