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Andy was selfish, and the band’s popularity had put a spotlight on that flaw in his character. But had Collin been using me all along? Was his love only a lie? If he’d been with Miranda while with me, that would certainly be true.
But I didn’t want to think about that. It hurt too much, and made me feel vulnerable and unsure.
“Is your friends being deceitful the only reason you’re so cynical?” I asked, wondering if there had ever been someone Martin had loved.
He frowned. “You’ve been in my house.” His thumb stopped moving. “Met my parents.”
“I’ve only met your mother.” But his dad’s presence overshadowed everything. Much like Martin did when he was around.
“Right. Only Grace then.” He tilted his head, giving that some consideration. “Well, I’m sure Miranda has told you all you need to know on the subject of my father.” His lids lowered, and so did the volume of his voice. “I’m sure you noticed how my mother does everything my father tells her to.”
I had noticed. But that didn’t seem to be what Martin wanted from me. The opposite, in fact. “Your sister doesn’t always do as told.”
“She rebels a little, but not consistently. And not about anything that matters.”
“Not like you did,” I said. “Refusing to go to law school. Starting Winston’s. Proving him wrong.”
Martin went very still, tense even. “Miranda did quite a bit of sharing.”
He didn’t like me having those insights about him. But I did. It made him seem like a man I could understand. One who might need my understanding. One who was tempting to me.
“I don’t think I had her confidence all that much.”
Not if she was having sex with my boyfriend all along. Had Collin ever stopping being her boyfriend?
“You had her confidence more than most, and her affection more than any other.”
Martin turned my hand over and began caressing my palm. I felt the patterns he traced in my skin in another part of me. Restless, I shifted my legs.
“She’s been conflicted, you know,” he said softly.
I frowned. “Not enough to avoid having sex with Collin.”
“He made his choices. He’s weak,” Martin said disdainfully. “My sister made hers to be with him. He isn’t worthy of her consideration. My parents won’t approve.”
I remembered our conversation at the park. Was Collin just a fling before Miranda eventually did what her father wanted? Or was he part of a bigger rebellion?
“What are you thinking now, my darling?”
I shook my head.
Martin didn’t press, but guessed accurately. “He isn’t worthy of what you gave him.”
He brought my hand to his mouth and pressed his lips to my skin. A needy shiver rolled through me that was magnified by the intensity in his very dark brown eyes.
“My heart, you mean?” I whispered.
“Yes, that.” Lowering my hand, pressing it into his thigh, he peered down the length of his strong nose at me.
“I don’t think it’s worth all that much,” I muttered. Not with it in pieces. Not with me tarnishing it, giving it away when I shouldn’t have.
“I believe it has great value,” Martin said beneath his breath.
“We’re here, Boss,” Arturo said.
His voice startled me. I’d been so absorbed in our conversation, in what Martin had just said, that I’d forgotten where we were, where we were headed, or what this really was.
Just a bargain. Just an agreement, and me just a commodity.
