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“Oh, yeah,” he said excitedly. “He was just getting to the part where he was about to be seduced by Francesca, his future wife.”
“And what does that have to do with the man in Marrakech?”
“Well, you interrupted the story, boss. If you want to know the ending, you have to stick around for it.”
That was one thing I couldn’t do. I’d wasted enough time trying to get answers out of FNG. I wouldn’t waste any more. “Just…don’t do anymore experiments on him.”
Fox tapped the side of his nose, then winked at me. “You got it, boss.”
39
FOX
Cash walkedout of the room moments later, leaving me alone with FNG. As soon as the door closed, FNG hopped up and slapped me on the back.
“Man, that was awesome! See? You’ve still got it!”
I hung my head in shame. It was all a lie. I didn’t get a thrill out of electrocuting him, and while I was happy to see his record of not being able to die still held true, I didn’t feel one bit better.
“Hey, what’s going on? You did it!”
“Yeah, by force,” I grumbled. “Did you see him? He baited me into electrocuting you.”
FNG’s brows furrowed. “I don’t think that’s what he was doing.”
I kicked at the dust on the floor, so ashamed that I was losing my edge. Grabbing the chair out of the pool, I plopped down in it, hanging my head like a puppy in trouble. “You had to argue with him to get me to do anything, and even then, it was just to prove that I still could. There was no satisfaction in it for me. I’m telling you, I’m losing my edge.”
“Hey, don’t talk like that. You’re not losing anything. You’re adapting to your environment. I don’t know another guy that can torture quite like you do. Yes, you use the same techniques over and over again, but you give it style. You know just how far to push before you’ve crossed the line. Just like now. You knew when to stop.”
“Not true,” I pointed out. “Cash pulled the plug. I would have kept going just to prove a point.”
He sighed and sat down on the floor beside me, leaning against the wall. “Yeah, I know how you feel. That’s what it was like the whole time I was out there. I felt like an imposter.”
“Right?” Man, I was so fucking happy that someone understood. “I always thought I needed Anna to calm the demons, but something changed. I’m…happy. Like all the time. That can’t be normal.”
He snorted. “Look, it’s not the end of the world. So, you’re happy? What’s so wrong with that?”
“I’ll tell you what’s wrong with it. It starts as being happy. Yes, I have a wife that I love and would do anything for. And I have kids, which is something I never thought I’d have. It’s all so fucking amazing. But what’s next? When you’re happy, there’s no place to go but down.”
“You could always get a dog. Maybe then you’d be even happier. Just don’t get one of those lap dogs. Get a real dog.”
I liked where he was going with this. “Yeah, like a Husky or a German Shepherd.”
“Exactly, and you can train it to be your sidekick. It could go with you on missions and be in the basement with you when you torture people.”
For just a moment, it sounded like a great idea, but the whole torturing people thing just wasn’t really working for me anymore. “What if…what if I stopped doing the whole...boiling people in acid thing?”
He looked at me funnily, like he didn’t understand the point of it all. “You don’t want to do that anymore?”
“Sadly, I just don’t think it’s in the cards for me any longer. When the pleasure in taking a life is gone, what’s the point in doing it?” Decision made, I slapped my knees and stood. “That’s it. I’m just not going to kill any more people. I’m taking a vow of…not killing.”
I was pleasantly surprised with how good it felt to make that decision. It was like a weight had been lifted from my shoulders and I could finally breathe again.
FNG jumped to his feet, his face filled with panic. “Whoa! You can’t just decide not to kill anymore. What if we’re out on a job? Are you going to kill then?”
“Nope,” I grinned. “I’m going to be the calm, rational person that talks the maniac down. I’ve seen it before on cop shows. I’m sure it’ll be fine.”
I headed for the door, but FNG quickly caught up with me. “It’ll be fine? You know that’s fiction, right? Those characters could just as easily die as they could come back to life!”
