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“He’s asleep.”
“Yeah,” he nodded. “It was only about five minutes. He must have been worn out.”
I nodded, sinking down on the couch beside my son, taking the book and placing it on the coffee table. “Well, thank you for tonight. I’m sure you didn’t intend to be over here for so long.”
“I liked it,” he answered, his voice gruff.
“You should probably get home. I have to get him to bed.”
“Right,” he answered as I picked up Parker, cradling him against my body. I started up the stairs, but Jack’s voice stopped me.
“Can we talk?”
“Tomorrow?”
He shook his head minutely. “Tonight, when you’re done.”
“Jack, it’s?—”
The desperate look on his face stopped me from kicking him out. Whatever Jack was wrestling with, I couldn’t turn him away.
“Let me put him to bed.”
It didn’t take long to put Parker to bed, but I stalled anyway, not sure I was ready for this conversation, even though this was precisely the reason I came here—to find out where we stood.
Steeling my nerves, I headed downstairs and sat beside Jack on the couch, waiting for him to speak. I don’t think I’ve ever been so nervous in my life, so terrified of what he might say. But I had a feeling, whatever was said tonight would change my life forever.
38
JACK
I was an addict—amurderer by anyone’s standards. Good or bad kill, I took someone’s life without a second thought. The cop wasn’t the first time I’d done it either. I always thought I was doing the right thing, but as I sat on the couch with an innocent child sleeping on my lap, shame unlike anything I’d felt before washed over me.
I’d been working through my addiction, trying to come to terms with my actions over the past few years. My therapist said I was being too hard on myself, but the reality was, I made the decision to follow Rafe. Whatever his intentions, it had poisoned something inside me. It twisted me into doing things that I never thought myself capable of.
How was I ever supposed to be the man Sky needed?
“What do you want to talk about?”
My gaze jerked to Sky, who was just descending the stairs. I was caught again, so lost in thought that I wasn’t paying attention to my surroundings. I didn’t even know where to start.
She sat down beside me, waiting patiently for me to talk. I stared into her beautiful eyes, remembering the first time I saw them. Fuck, I wanted to be the man for her.
“Jack, it’s getting late. Maybe we should do this another time.”
“I—” Again, the words wouldn’t come. Telling her about the jobwith Rafe wouldn’t help her understand anything about me. I had to start at the beginning. “I was responsible for my sister after my parents…They weren’t good people. I wanted to give her a better life. And one day, I was supposed to pick her up from work, but ended up working longer than I should have. When I got home…I realized I forgot to pick her up. It wasn’t until hours later that I found her.”
I didn’t have to say what happened to her. Sky was a nurse. I was pretty sure she’d seen it before.
“After I beat the shit out of the guy that attacked her, I was given the choice between jail and the military. I thought by joining the military, I would be giving her a family to watch over her. She took her own life,” I said quietly. “I wasn’t there, and I didn’t realize how much she was hurting. I failed her the night she was attacked, and again when I didn’t hear her cries for help. Taking out men like the guy who attacked her wasn’t enough. That’s when I met Rafe, and I thought he was really making a difference. Maybe he is,” I said, shaking my head. “But…”
That was all I had. I didn’t know how to tell her anything more than that. She scooted closer to me, taking my hand in hers. “You don’t have to be perfect. I know you’re working through a lot of stuff, and I’m patient. But you can’t disappear on me and Parker. Either you’re here as his friend or as his neighbor…whatever you can be. But if you disappear on him…he doesn’t understand it.”
“And you?” I asked, looking into her eyes. “What am I to you?”
“You pushed me away,” she reminded me.
“Because I hurt you. Fuck, part of me worries that it’ll happen again.”
