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“Can you heal her?”Lucas asks, sitting next to me on the living room couch.He puts one hand on Juliet and leans in, brows furrowed.
“I don’t know how,” I remind him.I’ve only been able to heal myself and right now I feel fucking selfish for that.I couldn’t heal Abby when she was dying in front of me.I couldn’t heal Easton as the life faded from him.“I don’t even know what’s wrong.”Tears fill my eyes and I position Juliet to my breast, holding my breath as I wait for her to latch.She does almost instantly and starts to nurse for a few seconds, just long enough for the milk to let down.And then she starts crying again.Milk drips onto her face and I try to get her to nurse again, desperation making my hands shake.I try again and it makes it worse.
New moms don’t get enough fucking credit.
“My love,” Lucas says, somehow able to hold it together.“Breathe.”
Inhaling, I hold my breath for a few seconds and then let it out.Finally, Juliet latches and starts nursing.Neither of us say anything as we watch, wanting to make sure she gets at least a little bit of milk.
“When did she spike a fever?”Lucas asks Eliza.
“I noticed as soon as we got here.She wasn’t hot before.She was normal baby-temperature,” she tells us.“What the hell is going on?”
“We haven’t figured it out completely out.”Lucas gently brushes Juliet’s wispy hair back.Silence falls over the room again and I can sense my familiars outside.I look up, telekinetically opening the front door to let Binx, Pandora, and Scarlet in the house, joining Freya.My familiars gracefully shadow over and Freya shifts back to cat form, jumping up on the couch next to me.
Scarlet, glamoured as an Irish Wolfhound, is less than graceful, though I can’t fault her completely.She’s a big-ass dog.Maybe Lucifer can turn her back into a golden retriever.I’m sure part of the reason Maxwell was parked on my road has something to do with the apparent “wolf attacks” that happened last Halloween.The bite marks would match a dog Scarlet’s size, so having her appear as a cute and fluffy golden could help take the heat off me.Though how would I explain why I got rid of my “other” dog?
That’s a question for another day.
“Kristy is on her way,” Betty says, shuffling into the room.“That blonde vampire was here.”
“I know.”I lean back a bit, trying to relax my own body in hopes it’ll help Juliet relax.“He’s…uh, I have no fucking idea.”My eyes land on Lucas and he does a good job avoiding looking back at me.Eliza doesn’t even know the full story of their relationship, and had believed for centuries that Lucas was closer to Eamon’s siblings than him, but I’m starting to question that.
“He’s not to be trusted,” Lucas says.“Do not invite him in.”
Betty tenses.“I won’t.”
Eliza tips her pretty face in Lucas’s direction, eyes narrowed slightly.Not knowing something about her maker is driving her crazy, I know.But now is not the time to question things.
“Does she feel any better?”Eliza asks instead.
“I don’t know,” I say.
“I have a thermometer.”Betty hurries out of the room, returning a minute later with it.Not wanting to make Juliet stop nursing, she takes her temperature on the side of her head instead of the center of her forehead like you’re supposed to.
“One hundred point one,” she reads.“I’m not sure how accurate that is though.”
“I’ve had a fever like once in my life,” I say, my eyes filling with tears again.“And it was because of a demon.”Is this how Lucas feels?It’s awful watching someone you love suffer in a way you won’t—because you can’t.And I want to take away her sickness and give her my health.Parenting hurts.
“Is this…is this because of a demon?”Betty’s voice trembles.She knows the truth about witches and demons.She knows I’m not fully human and that Lucas is Juliet’s father because he was hexed with humanity.My mind is going a million miles an hour, and I can’t separate my thoughts.What was the last update I gave her?
I need a fucking group text or a blog to keep everyone up to date on the shitshow that is my life.
Dizziness crashes down on me and my eyes fall shut.The stress is too much right now.Not just on me, but on Juliet.Only hours ago, she was kidnapped by demons and almost sacrificed.My father made sure she was physically in perfect health, but mentally?Will this create some sort of subconscious trauma she won’t be able to recall but will affect her later in life?
Trust issues?Anxious attachment?Who the fuck knows.
Dad, I mentally call.I don’t know what’s going on.Juliet is sick.Please help me.
Binx rubs against my legs, able to sense how close I am to coming undone.It’s been a long time since I’ve been able to fall back on my go-to coping mechanism of drinking wine and feeling the alcohol numb me.And right now, I could really fucking use a glass of wine.
Fuck that.
I could use the whole fucking bottle.
Lucas and Eliza both look up, able to hear Kristy pull in the driveway before Betty and I do.Juliet is feverishly nursing and starts getting frustrated when the milk slows down.I switch her to the other side, thankfully she latches back on right away.
“Hey,” Kristy pants, coming into the house and shutting the door behind her.“Is Juliet okay?”
