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He wasn’t kidding. I nearly fell off the horse, my muscles somehow simultaneously stiff and loose like Jell-O, as my mind raced through a sticky cloud of feeling. Was it all physical feeling? Was it also emotion? Was it mainly emotion? I couldn’t tell. I was contained in it, muffled by it, lost and confused.
My head hurt. My snotty nose was gross. My knees shook.
Luke held me close and wiped away my tears and mucus. He kissed my forehead and whispered praise as he reached down to stroke my cock. It was hard. How? I hadn’t even noticed it during the entire flogging.
“You need to come,” Luke murmured. “Do you want to?”
From a great distance, I nodded.
“All right. You’re going to get to come, but first we’re gonna do something different.”
I nodded again.
“There’s only one rule.”
I whimpered and huddled against him. The sting from my ass and haunches was still immense, and I shivered and groaned as it pulsed through me like a warning. It was so good, and so bad, but not enough. Because inside me, I was still the boy who’d come on his father’s cock, the boy who’d sucked his father off, the boy who’d gotten HIV and let a bully frat boy break his arm, and—
“Whenever you feel ashamed, you have to say ‘I love you, Mitchell.’” Luke kissed my hair. “‘I love you, Mitchell.’ You’ll say that every time.”
“All right,” I croaked. My throat was raw from my crying andscreaming.
“Do you feel ashamed now?”
I nodded.
“Say it.”
“I love you, Mitchell.” My voice was small, and I felt silly saying it, but somewhere, deep down, it felt like a smaller version of me took hold of my hand and clung to it. “I love you, Mitchell.”
“Good boy. You’re doing a great job.” Luke turned me around, bent me over the horse, and checked my ass. “There’s going to be significant bruising. No skin breakage. The pain will linger, though.”
My skin felt like it was on fire, and every shift made it ache deeper in the muscle tissue.
He rubbed his hand over my haunches. “Who beat your ass?”
“You did, Sir.”
“Every time you feel ashamed, remember how you surrendered, how you gave up and let yourself fly. Remember how you took suffering and changed it to something amazing. You’re powerful. You’re strong.”
I moaned.
Luke landed a smack on the flank of my hip. It was like a pain bomb going off in my mind. I shouted and clenched the edge of the horse, dizzy and covered in fresh sweat.
Luke’s hand went around my throat and he hauled me up, cutting off the ease of my breath. “Say it.”
“I love you, Mitchell.” I pushed the words through on a tiny bit of air. My cock was hard still, jutting out from me with a pearl of pre-cum on the tip. I could feel the cool air of the basement on my groin, and the rough pain of Luke’s jeans against my abraded ass.
“Good.” Luke released me. “This is going to get gross, Mitchell. This is going to be painful, but not physically. In your head.” He touched my head. “In your heart.” He touched my back. “Are youready?”
I gritted my teeth together and nodded, bracing myself.
“Remember you have a safe word.”
It was all I could do not to roll my eyes. If he reminded me one more time… Images of kicking him across the room, of pounding him with my fists, of making him see what I could do, how powerful I was, how much I held back…
Luke thrust into me, long, hard, and rough. I screeched as his hips slapped my sore ass cheeks, my fingers clenching and releasing the edge of the horse.
“Say it,” Luke commanded, bottoming out in me.
