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People who still won’t work with the Hawkes because he’s involved with them.
And now, we’ve got this boy to think about—the boy who now has no onebecauseof us. That guilt weighs on him as heavily as it does me, even if we both know, deep down, that it was the right thing to do.
I just hope he doesn’t allow it to eat him alive the way I did when I hid my relationship with him from the people I care about the most.
* * *
LUCA
A few stars twinkle in the dark sky through the cloud cover, and I stare up at them and release a heavy breath, trying to let some of the stress and uncertainty of the last twenty-four hours go with it.
I haven’t even attempted to sleep since I laid eyes on Jude yesterday, and I wouldn’t have been able to even if I hadn’t been busy with…other things.
All I see when I close my eyes is him.
The way he cowered behind that dumpster, terrified of me finding him and discovering what he was doing,.
How his body shook when I grabbed his arm and brought him into the club and to my office.
His terrified gaze following every move Byron or I made, like he was anticipating having to run.
I’ve seen fear in a lot of people’s eyes over my lifetime, people who knew what was coming and suffered far worse fates at my hands, but there was something about the way Jude looked at me, petrified but also begging for help, that wouldn’t let me look away.
And now, here we are, and I have no fucking idea what to do about it.
I glance over at Byron, who offers me a tight smile. This has been rough on him, too, even though he wasn’t the one who had to get his hands bloody. He carries the weight of knowing what I did, of what we agreed to do, as soon as we found out what happened to Jude.
Byron reaches out and rests his hand on my arm. “I think…” He swallows thickly and glances at Savage and back at me. “I think we need to keep him.”
It’s the same thing I’ve been thinking, but neither of us has had the guts to say it. We both felt it the moment we met him, and somehow, we knew, deep in the pit of our stomachs, that this was somehow meant to happen.
I nod. “I think so, too. But I don’t even know…shit!” I shake my head and scrub my hand across my face. “How would we even go about doing this legally? What court is going to grant Luca Abello custody of a ten-year-old kid? Hell,anykid?”
It’s why Byron and I have never even considered the possibility of having a family. We always assumed it was out of our reach because of my past, that we would have to pay that penance for the life I chose.
But this is different.
Savage nods slowly. “We’ll talk to Stone. We know enough people, Judge Cramer, our friends at HSD. We can figure something out to make it happen.”
I push off from the lounge chair and start pacing beside the pool while Savage and Byron watch me. Even another sip of the strong scotch doesn’t help quell my frustration.
The sliding glass door opens, and Stone steps out, his eyes darting across all of us as he comes to join and stands beside his brother. “What’s going on out here?”
Savage gives him a half-grin. “I’m pretty sure Luca and Byron just decided they want to adopt Jude.”
Stone’s eyes widen slightly, and his gaze cuts between us.
I rub my hand at the back of my neck as I pace back and forth, back and forth, my Italian loafers scraping along the concrete pool decking. “Do you think it’s possible?”
He crosses his arms over his chest and nods. “Yeah. I mean, HSD already approved you for temporary emergency custody. You’ll have to jump through all the hoops, but since the father won’t be a problem anymore…” He trails off slightly. “I think we can make it happen if that’s what Jude wants.”
I freeze mid-step and whirl to face Byron. “Shit. What if he doesn’t?”
Byron’s shoulders slump slightly, and he rests his elbows on his knees, steepling his fingers in front of his face. “I hadn’t even thought of that. He was so scared of us last night, petrified of the whole situation. He barely even spoke two words to Nora other than when she told him she needed to know to make sure he was okay. He wouldn’t even speak to us unless absolutely necessary. He’s spent the whole day in the damn closet with Allie. Maybe this isn’t what’s best for him. Maybe he should—”
“No.” Savage’s interjection carries through the night air. “He’s a Hawke now. This is what’s best for him, and you both know it. Wealldo. We can take care of him, all of us. Together.”
His insistence relieves some of the tension in my chest.
