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I peer over at him and fist my hands, trying like hell to control myself. What if I start crying? Jesus, I’ll never live it down. I’m a man, not a blubbering whale.
“Nothing.”
His eyebrows meet. “No, it’s something. What is it?”
I purse my lips and sigh. “I’m a fucking idiot, is what.”
“What? Why?”
“Because I’m letting you play these games with me. And I know that’s what this is. A fucking game.”
For a moment, I hope he’ll immediately contradict it, but he doesn’t. He’s quiet instead.
He pauses for a long time, staring out the windshield. The light turns green and a horn honks behind us, startling us both. With no hesitation, he accelerates forward and my head knocksagainst the headrest. My hands clasp onto my thighs, and I pinch myself.
Shit, not that hard.
“What games are you talking about?” he finally grinds out.
“All the games. All night you’ve been playing them and yet, here I am. On the way home with you. I’m as stupid as stupid can be.”
He huffs and his hands tighten on the steering wheel, almost strangling it.
“You want me to bring you home then?”
I contemplate it only momentarily before realizing that I’m committed. I’m going down with the ship on this one. I’m a team player.
“No. It’s fine. We’re already almost there.”
He licks his lips and eyes me. “You sure?”
I nod and he sighs, fidgeting in his seat. I can hear the wheels spinning on the pavement, can hear the wheeze of the heater when Alec finally utters, “You’re not a game, Jude.”
“You sure? Cuz I feel like I am.”
He swallows and looks away. “Yeah. I am. It’s not a game.You’renot a game.”
I swear I hear “not anymore” whispered, but I’m not sure if I’m imagining things, so I let it go. I’m a little buzzed and a little horny, and I don’t trust myself right now. I’ve already shown all my cards by uttering that I think I’m a game. I’ve made myself vulnerable and I hate that. I hate that he holds all the power right now. So I rein the emotions in and stuff them down.
There’s time for those later. Not right now.
“We’re here,” he says as he pulls up to a small townhouse on a cute little street near downtown. Actually, the more I look, I realize that he’s right near Helen’s place—his grandmother that we baked cookies with.
He places the car in park and shuts the engine off. The silence is almost deafening, and I lean back in my seat and adjust my hard cock. I might have been feeling unsure the entire drive, but my little buddy hasn’t. He’s down for anything.
“You sure you want to come inside?” he asks.
I know he’s looking at my dick. It’s a mound in my pants, trying to wiggle its way out of its confines.
“Yeah, think so.”
“Alright. Let me show you what I got for you. It’s inside.”
“Yeah. Okay,” I reply with a small voice.
He steps out of the car and I follow him up the driveway. It’s dark out, past midnight and the late spring air is only a little frigid. No one is out right now. It’s just the two of us.
“This is my place,” he says as he pulls his keys out and opens the front door.
