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I know it’s hard because he adjusts himself, cursing me under his breath. It only makes me grin wider.
“So what’s so special about this maze?” I ask as he pulls into a dirt parking lot. McNamara Farms, the ancient wooden sign reads, and I glance over at Alec who is pulling his sweatshirt on.
“Well, I love this one because it’s year-round. Usually out here it’s all corn mazes, you know? But it’s spring, so they erect the mazes out of hay.”
“Erect,” I say with a laugh, and Alec rolls his eyes.
“Dork.”
He hops out of the truck, and I follow him, walking closely by him, our hands brushing as we move. Glancing around, I notice no one is looking at us, no one gives a shit, so I take a deep breath and link my fingers with his. He stumbles forward slightly at my touch and then peers over at me. My cheeks are flaming, just splotches of hot lava, but I’m glad I did it because he’s pulled that lip between his teeth and is fighting back a smile.
“You sure?” he whispers, and I nod.
I want to be brave for once in my life. Want to be someone I’m proud of.
“Yeah.”
“Alright, Jude Martin, let’s go.” He tugs me toward a rickety ticket booth and pays for our entrance fees. I don’t even fight it, just take in every aspect of being on a sort-of-date with this guy.
When we make it to the entrance of the maze, we both stop, our hands still linked. A group of kids shoots past us, one almost running into us, and then we stride forward, entering the maze in silence.
We take our time moving through it, going back and forth almost lazily. I’m just enjoying holding his hand out in public. I mean, mostly in public. We’re in the middle of a hay maze and no one else is really around. I wonder if he’s ever been with anyone like me. Or have all the guys he’s been with been…you know, positively gay.
“What? What’s that look for?” Alec asks when I glance over at him a little too long.
“Nothing.”
“No, it’s something. What’s up?”
“Well, okay, um, how many guys have you dated?” I ask slowly and then glance away, not wanting to see the look on his face. God, what if he’s dated a hundred dudes and I’m like the worst one? Oh shit.
“Um, a few,” he says and then squeezes my hand softly. “Why?”
“No reason. Just curious. Just didn’t know.”
He stops walking and pulls me into a small alcove. Suddenly, I’m pressed up against a scratchy bale of hay as his hips push against mine, keeping me in place.
“Are you getting jealous again?”
I scoff. “No. I was just curious, like I said.”
“Well, like my grandma said, I’ve never brought anyone serious home.”
I swallow and peer up at him.
“What does that mean? You serious about me?”
He wets his lips and meets my gaze. “Maybe.”
He doesn’t elaborate, just pecks a kiss to my lips and then pulls me out of the alcove. He walks quickly, and I jog to catch up to him. When I reach him, I pull his arm around my waist and lean into him. His lips press against the side of my face, his breath warm against me, and I sigh. I really like this. I really fucking like it. How did I ever think any of this was a hobby?
Jude Martin is an idiot.
“I really wasn’t jealous. I really was just curious. You know, because I’m so…I’m not…you know, and I have no experience. And I wonder if I’m any good.”
Alec’s fingers slide up under my sweatshirt near my hip and toy with my skin. It makes goosebumps erupt across my body.
“You’re just fine. I like everything we do together.”
