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“Maybe I can help with that,” she said. “But first, I have to tell you that you’re right.” She withdrew her hand, clenching it in her lap.
“About?”
“Rushing into something physical. I tend to jump the gun in that respect. I always want to get to the good stuff.”
“Oh?” He felt a bit deflated, and he knew he shouldn’t. He couldn’t even talk her out of it because he was the one who had talked her into it.
“Oh, indeed. It was your words that made me think about all my relationships and my fundamental issues with them.”
“The rushing problem?”
“Yes, and more. I will keep that to myself for now. I’m still sifting through things.” Her barriers seemed nonexistent here, and he felt ashamed that he couldn’t do the same thing. She revealed something quite surprisingly vulnerable beneath her confident surface. “For that reason, I think we should...”
His stomach sank, and his chest got tight. She was smart to nix it between them, even with how hot their kiss had been, he wasn’t sure he could ever be the kind of man she deserved.
She took a hard breath. “I’m interested in you, but I don’t want to make this something superficial…um…not meaningful.” She bit her lip. “I like you, Shark, so many things about you, and I want to get to know you before we…give into this tension between us.”
Here he thought she was telling him that she didn’t want anything, but that wasn’t the case. He was momentarily shocked, expecting her to put on the brakes, which meant he mattered to her somehow. There had been both fear and yearning when she’d admitted her feelings. “So, what exactly are you saying?”
“We should date, hang out with each other, and have fun.”
“Date?” Shark rose and paced away, only partly relieved to be back on solid footing. The rest of him was still stuck on the word.
“Maddy, this assignment I’m on isn’t conducive to dating. We are on active duty.”
She rose. “So, are you saying you want something physical instead?” Her heated gaze never left him.
“What? No…um…yes, but?—”
“That’s so decisive,” she said with a winsome smile that took away his guard and left him defenseless again.
“I want you more than I want my next breath,” he growled, closing the short distance between them, forging into dangerous territory, and not caring as much as he should. He wanted her in more than his bed, which was a huge revelation and strengthened her request for them to slow down. He was desperate to get his focus back, his body overcoming his mind in this. Maybe having her would get him back on more even ground.
“Oh, that’s a bit more decisive,” she whispered, looking up at him with a hot, taunting light in her eyes. “I want you, too. I can’t get the feel of you out of my mind. Maybe dating is overrated, and I can work through my own shortcomings while we fuck each other’s brains out.”
His entire body tightened at the memory, and renewed awareness sliced through him, sharp and intense. He struggled to keep a tight rein on his desire and knew it was tenuous at best.
“If things go south?—”
“I’ll be on my best behavior,” she promised, moving closer to him. Stopping in front of him, mere inches away. She slid her hands up along his shoulders and around his neck, searing him with the exquisite feel of her breasts brushing against his chest.
“Is this your best behavior?”
“Oh, handsome, you haven’t seen my best behavior,” she said, her voice a husky murmur.
She knew exactly what she was doing, knew the risks she was taking, and was ready and willing to accept the consequences of her actions. Shark was in big, big trouble.
“I can’t make any promises, Maddy, and when you get to know me, I’m not sure you’ll like what you find.”
“Why don’t you let me be the judge of that and worry about that all on my own? I’m a big girl.”
Maddy with her smart mouth and her smarter brain with her oh-so-intellectual discourse on earthquakes. She’d used words he’d never heard of and each and every one of those words had come out of the most beautiful take-me-now mouth he’d ever seen. Everything about her was so wildly gorgeous. She’d used words like isoseismal and seiche, quaternary, and colluvium.
He simply bent over and threw her over his shoulder. He wasn’t going to waste any more time fighting with himself. He was always good at figuring things out as he went along. He was going to give over to this need inside him because he wanted her. He wanted what she offered.
He walked through the house, calling Beast to him. They climbed the stairs, Maddy grabbing his butt and making him clasp the handrail. “Stop that,” he said, “before we pitch down the stairs.” Her response was just to giggle.
He went into Brawler’s room and didn’t even have to say anything as Beast docilely went into his kennel. He latched it and soon was kicking the door to her room closed.
