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Now, he knelt on his knees at my feet like an offering. Like he still didn’t understand the way I saw him. As if he hadn’t already been absolved.
He curled both hands around mine, and he pressed my knuckles to his lips, staring up at me when he began to speak. “Now that you’re home, I need to say a few things.”
I pulled my hand away and brushed my fingertips through his hair, silently encouraging him to continue.
His eyes dropped closed for a moment, like he was gathering himself.
Then he opened them and stared up at me with that potent gaze, his voice rough and raw when he began to speak. “The day everything went bad, you asked me to love you, Paisley. To trust you to stand beside me and Evelyn. You’d promised we could do it together. But I pushed you away because I thought it was the answer. I thought having you in my life would only bring you danger, and I was terrified of it. So fucking terrified of you being hurt that I hurt you.”
Pain filled his raspy words. “I said things that were lies to drive you away. And still, you ended up right back with us, anyway.”
A choked sound locked in my throat. I ran my fingertips down the sharp edge of his gorgeous face.
Electricity hummed at the connection.
Affection spun through his features, and he reached up, fluttering his fingers over the bandage on my throat without touching it. “You protected her, Paisley, protected this child that was committed to my care. Protected this child the way a mother would.”
Moisture gathered in my eyes, and Caleb pushed up higher on his knees. Running his fingers through my hair, his head angled in emphasis. “You protected her the way I want to forever protect you. The way I should have in the first place. By keeping you close, right beside me where you belong, but I was the fool who thought you’d be better off with me pushing you away.”
He swallowed hard, his throat bobbing with emotion. “But pushing you away only hurt us. And I know I have warned you that I’ve done horrible things in this life, and I have. Any number of them could have made someone hate me enough that they were willing to commit these atrocious acts to get back at me. That’s not going to go away, Paisley, but I can promise you that I will be a better man than the one I was. I’ll fight to be worthy of you and Evelyn.”
“Caleb.” Emotion curled through his name.
He shook his head. “Please let me finish.”
I dipped my chin in a soft nod, my insides shaking with his confession, and he only held onto me tighter as he continued, his thumb brushing over the tears that kept tracking down my cheeks. “I’d only allowed myself to love one person in my life because I never thought I had the right, and maybe I don’t, but it doesn’t matter.”
He took me by both sides of the face, framing it in his big hands, the burn of his eyes meeting mine. “Because there is not one thing in this fucking world that could stop me from loving you, Paisley Dae. Not one thing. Because I love you. I love you today, and I’ll love you tomorrow, and I’ll love you forever. And I’m kneeling here, at your feet, begging you to forgive me. Begging you to love me back.”
Everything I thought I’d lost swelled in anticipation, and I pushed out quieted words around my sore throat, unable to keep from speaking. “You think I stopped loving you? Do you think I didn’t understand? That I didn’t know?”
“I hate that I hurt you. That I did it wrong.”
I nodded through the blur of tears. “You did do it wrong, but then we finally did it together, and that’s what matters.”
Air puffed from his nose, and he nodded. “Together.”
“Together,” I mouthed.
He dropped his forehead to mine. “I love you, Paisley. I love you in a way I didn’t know existed. In a way that I feel in every beat of my heart. With every breath that I take. You consume every minute. Every second. You and Evelyn? You’re my life now. In every way.”
Joy bound me in intricate knots, my voice rasping with the truth. “And I love you. Every day. Now and forever.”
Torment continued to roil in his eyes. His regrets. The sins. Everything he’d done wrong. I touched the hollow beneath his eye. “Are you upset that you weren’t the one to end him?”
I remembered…remembered how vehemently he’d wanted to be. The vengeance that had pounded through his bloodstream, driving him to animosity and hate. He’d thought he’d succumb to it.
His head shook, and his voice deepened in emphasis. “I wanted revenge, Paisley. I’d wanted to hurt the man who’d hurt my sister, somehow thinking it might make up for the things that I’d done. But in the end, it didn’t matter—it didn’t matter because the only thing that mattered was you and Evelyn.”
