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I don’t know, Ruby, that seems pretty bad to me.
But think about history, Luca. I could have all these problems, and my teeth could be rotting out of my head. I could be working fourteen hours a day for basically no money and, if I’m lucky, live to be fifty only to die of some horrible disease or from the so-called treatment of the disease. It can ALWAYS be worse.
Wow, he replies. You really are the mature one. I’ve never thought about stuff like that before.
It’s pretty much all I think about, I tell him. During arguments, lows, and uncertainty, I always think about the past, putting myself in different eras. It makes everything far more manageable.
It’s good, admirable, he says. But it also seems like a way to downplay how bad things are. You’re allowed to be upset.
I’m about to reply, but then I see?—
…
Those ever-present tingles keep dancing around my body.
I’m going to sort the photo, Luca goes on. But Nate might get away with it.
What do you mean? I reply.
I won’t be able to hurt him.
I didn’t know that was part of the plan. I just want him to stop.
It was always part of the plan, he texts. Unfortunately, sometimes, other factors get in the way of what is right. I want you to know, Ruby, if I had my way, he’d never be able to look at you, speak to you, or even say your name again.
Thank you, I reply. You’re a good person.
A pause. I imagine him chuckling. Maybe he thinks I’m naïve. You might not say that if you knew exactly what I was speaking about. What are your plans for the rest of the night?
I glance at the clock. It’s 11:47 p.m. You mean for the next thirteen minutes?
Such a smartass. Now, I imagine him smirking. Are you busy? Or am I taking you somewhere?
I end up pressing my legs together. There’s a crazy amount of tension down there. My clit feels weirdly sensitive, way more than it’s ever been before, rubbing up against my underwear. My head is cloudy.
Like a date? I ask because I have to know. I can’t be vague about this. If he wants me, that will be enough to deal with. But wondering if he wants me will make it even more difficult.
Not like a date—a date. So, when am I picking you up?
CHAPTER 6
Luca
I sit at the end of her street like she asked. I’d prefer to go into the house and shake her dad’s hand. This feels seedy and underhanded, which is hilarious. Luca Marino is giving a damn about being respectable.
Looking across the street, I grit my teeth at the sight of her house. It’s rundown, not the sort of place Ruby belongs, but where does she belong, exactly? How can I know she belongs with me? How the fuck can I know that?
I check my phone. Nothing new, just her last text. Okay, let’s do this! Then she gives me her address. The exclamation mark is the only one she’s used. It gives this whole thing a sense of danger and adventure. This is a big deal for her, a date. She’s so much younger than me but look at Elio and Scarlet. Their age gap hasn’t stopped them.
My head aches when I think of Elio. Maybe it’s the smart move, not rushing in and hurting a congressman’s son for a stranger. Still, when it came to Russel, I helped him. I would’ve killed that bastard for my brother.
The front door opens. In the semidarkness, I can only see Ruby’s silhouette. Even that is enough to get me stirring. Her shape. The ways her hips move highlight their thickness. She raises her hand and waves to me. Then she stops and turns. Somebody must’ve called her from the house.
A light switches on, and a man appears at the door, walking onto the steps. The light from the house lets me get a look at him. Am I going nuts? Maybe this day has been too long, but I could swear that’s Paulie. His hair is gray now, not black, and slicked back with product. I’m almost sure it’s him. It’s not impossible. We live in the same city, after all. If it is him, though, dating his daughter just got a hell of a lot more complicated.
They talk for a moment. Then she walks down the street past my car and keeps walking. I understand. She’s told him some lie and wants me to play along. I wait until she’s at the end of the street and Paulie—if it is him—has gone inside. Then I drive over to Ruby, hating the sneaking around.
“Sorry,” she murmurs when I reach over and open the door. She slides into the passenger seat. Her cheeks are blazing red. She looks so vivacious, so young, so beautiful. “I didn’t know how to explain what I was doing to Dad. I don’t even know how to explain it to myself, you know?”
