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Life.
Death.
Nothing mattered then. I was weightless—free. I was everything and nothing all at the same time. I could’ve stayed there forever if my lungs didn’t cry out for air.
My pulse slowed, and my chest burned, and I wondered when my body would fight for survival. But it never happened.
Was I broken?
Or simply lost?
I sat up with a gasp and pushed my sodden hair out of my face, resting my head against the side of the tub. The water was getting cold—my fingers pruned—and I knew my bath was nearing its end. I sighed. Back to meandering around my chambers and being bored to death. Although I didn’t like Talon or our training sessions, I enjoyed getting out of these stuffy four walls.
Wringing my hair over the tub, I stepped onto the slick marble floor, holding onto the nearby banister so I wouldn’t slip. As elegant as the bathroom was, there wasn’t a rug in sight. Or art on the wall. Or any knickknacks, for that matter. It lacked warmth and the smaller details that’d give it a welcoming feel. Only the bare necessities and nothing more. I was sure it was a purposeful reminder of our impermanence. In life, and in their castle.
I couldn’t complain. At least I wasn’t locked up in a dirt-covered dungeon. Only, being here made me miss home. Miss it in the most wistful, aching type of way. The soft crackle of the fireplace and the warm smell of cinnamon. Mother’s soft humming. My wall of books.
A deep longing welled beneath my ribcage as tears leaked down my cheeks, and I muffled my cries into the towel. I’d been trying my best to keep my emotions buried, determined not to let them interfere with the trials and training, but something inside me opened the tap.
Silent tears welled up, and up and up, an unstoppable cascade streaming down my face, each droplet a wordless expression of the emotions that I couldn’t share with anyone. Everything seemed to hit me like a loaded carriage. I worried about my mother and Sugarfoot and how they were doing—if they were giving Betrys a run for her money.
My throat constricted. Hundreds of thoughts and scenarios played in my head as I sobbed into the towel, praying to the stars I’d make it back to see them.
A soft whimper escaped by swollen lips.
This wasn’t me. I didn’t give up.
I couldn’t.
So, I collected myself after a minute and finished drying off before heading back into the bedchamber to change. Gripping the brass knob, I pushed the door open, expecting to breeze through the doorway and to my wardrobe when I slammed into a tall, firm body.
My breath hitched as a pair of concerned emerald orbs analyzed me.
“What are you doing in here?” I demanded, clenching the towel tighter to my body. “Don’t you knock?”
“I did. A few times, actually. I let myself in when you didn’t answer.” He cocked his head, his brows pulling together. “You’ve been crying?”
“No,” I denied and squeezed past him—Talon’s entire body filled the small space, making it difficult to maneuver around him.
“Then why are the whites of your eyes red?”
“Allergies.” I wiped at my nose and pulled open the dresser drawer. “I’m not used to thepollen.”
“Pollen?”
“Yep.” I shifted my weight between my feet, feeling self-conscious under the weight of Talon’s careful gaze. If he didn’t believe me, he didn’t let on. “What are you doing here, anyway?”
“Well, given your track record, I wanted to make sure you didn’t try running off again.”
“You’re not going to let that go, are you?”
Talon raised a brow.
I huffed. “Yeah, thought so. Well, unfortunately for you, I don’t plan on being a drowler snack, so…” I motioned to the door. This conversation was over.
“I see you’re still pissy from our session earlier.” He clicked his tongue. “What a shame. Guess I’ll take this with me.” He flashed a roll of parchment from behind his back, using the end of it to scratch his head.
My eyes widened, glimpsing the silver tin he held in his pocket.
