AllFreeNovel
Share Us
At first, I start to roll my eyes, but then a heavy sadness takes over. I don’t want him to go.
He is so tough and bold and strong, but I could see right away that I hurt him when I said I was still a prisoner here. Yes, it might be true, but I know why. I know why he is keeping me locked up here with him.
My thoughts churn over those men who took me and threw me into that container. They broke my bones, they made me bleed, they starved me and beat me. With them, I was in prison. With Kiril, even though his methods are domineering and controlling, I know in his mind he is doing it all to keep me safe from those assholes.
And when I tried to run away and came face to face with all of them again, I realized just how much truth there was behind Kiril’s words.
I sigh heavily and kick at the dirt, sending a cloud of dusty sand into the air.
I have been asking Kiril questions, learning about who he is and about his family.
I have been trying to get information—anything—that I can give back to those disgusting men in order to keep my friend safe. But I have nothing. I doubt they care about Kiril’s favorite things or that time he watched the sunset in Mexico and thought it was so beautiful he wished he could take me back in time to see it with him.
The more I learn about him the more I am drawn to him. The more I talk to him the more I want to talk to him. And the worse I feel about what I have to do to keep Lauren safe and out of the clutches of those evil men.
I never meant to sleep with Kiril. That was most certainly not my plan. I just seemed to lose all control over myself. I shake my head and smirk ever so slightly. I knew was losing control a while before it actually happened. I have been staring at him lately, admiring his gorgeous features, his solid body, and the way his muscles move beneath his clothing. I have been wanting to lay my body against his—but I was not going to. I never planned to actually do it.
But when you mix that intense physical attraction with the growing emotional attachment … I lost control.
We have been getting so close lately. So intimate, on an emotional level.
Now I am standing in the garden alone, feeling alone, feeling terrible, actually. Guilt. It’s a horrible thing to experience. Kiril has been so good to me. What I have to do to him is horrible. But Lauren—I will do anything for her.
I decide, standing alone staring at the sky, that I need to push everything aside. I need to ignore absolutely everything I am feeling and do whatever it takes to protect Lauren. I know how scary it was to be locked in that container—to meet those men. And that was only the start of it. I know it only gets worse from there. I can’t even imagine what the other girls, who did not get away, are going through right now. I wonder if they are still alive. Because of that, knowing the things I know, I have to sacrifice anything and everything to keep Lauren from having to go through the same thing.
I am going to need to start taking their threat more seriously and find something that they want. Information.
***
Over the next few weeks, I do my best to avoid Kiril. We still eat together and we talk, but I don’t question him like I used to. I do my best not to encourage him or let him think that we are more than just—whatever we are. The problem is that my emotions are still off on their own mission. My heart misses him when he is not with me. It feels heavy when he is smiling at me and his eyes are lit up with enthusiasm and tenderness. I have to tell my heart to stop feeling whatever it is feeling. I have to try and block things out, but it is getting more and more challenging to do that.
Kiril is not the kind of man I am supposed to fall for. He is dangerous. He does not abide by the law or live in the same world I know and understand. Even though I know he would not do what those other men did to me, he is still a part of the world they live in, and he does other things. I don’t know what yet but apparently, I have to find out in order to give those assholes enough information to stop them from hurting my friend.
So, while I have been avoiding spending time with Kiril, I have also been doing my best to look around the mansion to try and find something. The problem is that I don’t know what I am looking for.
I spent hours in the library, looking through the shelves in case he has files there. I snuck into his bedroom and looked through his drawers. His clothing smelt like him and it was distracting to me. I got into his office, only briefly, and found most of the cabinets and drawers locked and I did not have enough time to try to open them.
I am frustrated and worried. When are those men going to arrive again and demand information? They didn’t tell me. I don’t know what to expect.
After dinner this evening, still sitting at the table with Kiril, I am absolutely exhausted. My bones feel weighed down as though they were pumped full of lead and I feel a bit dizzy.
Kiril leans towards me and places his hand on my forehead.
“Little rabbit, you look very pale.” His brow is tight and traced with concern.
“I’m okay. I just feel really tired.” I push my plate away from me. I did not eat much but the leftover food is making me want to throw up. I have heard that trauma and stress do crazy things to your body, and I begin to wonder if this is all just the residual effects of what I went through. What I guess I am still going through. Stress and trauma, breaking me down.
“I think I’m just going to go to bed,” I say.
“Yes, I think that’s a good idea.”
I stand and the dizziness suddenly becomes overwhelming. I grip the back of the chair to try and steady myself, but I feel myself falling. I don’t know how he gets there so fast, but Kiril’s arms are around me and lifting my feet off the ground before I can actually fall.
He cradles me in his arms and my first instinct is to demand that he puts me down right away, but I don’t have the strength and he smells so divine. I rest my head against his muscular shoulder and close my eyes.
“I don’t like this; did you eat something that upset you? Do you maybe have a virus?”
“I think it might just be my body’s way of dealing.”
