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My jaw dropped open when I saw him.
He came to say goodbye and lifted me off my feet with one arm, holding me against him and kissing me as though he might never see me again.
He promised me he would be back, though. He’d better keep that promise.
I am so tense with worry and nerves. I hope he will be okay. He has to be okay. There is no other outcome that I will accept.
Darya arrived at the house about an hour ago. She had breakfast and relaxed in the living room while Kiril was getting ready. She was acting as though they were getting ready to go out for a game of golf or something. I have no idea how she is keeping it together. All of her brothers are heading out to practically go to war against a seriously dangerous man. She seems so confident in the fact that they will succeed.
I followed Kiril to the front door and watched him climb into the car with a knot in my stomach. He grinned at me and blew me a kiss. His brothers even smiled and gave me a curt wave.
Fyodor was the only brother who came up to me to say something. He wrapped his arm around my shoulder and promised me that he would get Kiril home safely.
I appreciate that. I appreciate that he took the time to reassure me.
I watched the car drive away and couldn’t find a way to walk away from the door, even after they were out of sight.
“Hey, Jenn, why don’t you come for a swim with me?” Darya asks, walking past in her bathing suit.
“I’m too agitated. I can’t think straight.” I turn away from the door, closing it behind me.
“The swim will do you good. Come on. I can have them make us some virgin cocktails.”
“I don’t know how you can be so calm right now. Aren’t you worried?”
“Of course, I am. But I’ve also learned to distract myself from all of it. I’ve had many of these moments in my life. You can’t let it get to you. This is what they do, not often, but they do. Come on. Get your bikini on.”
“How often do they do this?” I ask nervously.
“Not that often, I promise. Look, the way I deal with it is to really appreciate all of the moments that I have with my brothers. Every day is a gift. I know in my heart that no matter what happens today, they know I love them, and I know they love me.”
“Gosh, that sounds morbid.”
She laughs again. “Don’t think of it that way. They will be back. They always come back. Now, stop focusing on it and come swim.”
“You go ahead. I’m just going to be in here for now.”
“Okay, girl, but don’t get too lost in your head about it. They’ll be home before you know it. They always come home.”
I nod, trying to process her words. They always come back. She knows what they are capable of. She would know how bad the risk is today. I am sure of it. She knows so much more than I do about this world.
Darya walks out onto the pool deck, and I continue to pace up and down the living room.
Having Darya here is making me miss Lauren. I wish she could be here with me right now. I really need the support of having her near me.
I am so happy Kiril said I could go and see her. Actually, I was thinking of going today, until he brought Darya here to keep an eye on me. But if she is by the pool …
I look around. Almost all of Kiril’s men are out on the mission with him. The house is the quietest it has been since I arrived here. This is actually the perfect time for me to go see Lauren. I can just slip out and be back before Kiril even gets home—and that way I will have something to do instead of driving myself absolutely crazy with worry. This stress is not good for the baby.
Kiril insisted that I don’t leave the house without his men near me, but if I go to Lauren, where his men are looking out for her, then they can keep an eye on both of us at the same time. Besides, all of Alexander Golubev’s men are going to be a bit too busy today to be worried about Lauren or me. The more I think about it the more I realize that there is no better moment for me to go and see her.
Kiril told me he was fine with me telling her everything, as long as I trusted her. Of course, I do. She is basically my family. So, I can spend an afternoon with her, pour my heart out, bring her up to date on all the crazy things that have been going on, and not have to think about what Kiril is doing right now.
I peek out towards the pool where Darya is floating on a Lilo, lazy in the sunshine.
I rush to my room and grab my handbag.
I have to move quickly. She is going to be so mad at me, but I know it will be alright.
