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For the first time in a very long time, I don’t think twice about disobeying him.
As I get up from the table, I feel the ties to my family and what I feel I have to do for them start to sever.
Dad no longer has the hold over me that he once had.
I love him, but I don’t know how to be the daughter he’s always wanted anymore. I have to be the person that I am, and he is either going to accept that or he isn’t.
Just like I have to accept the person that Christian is.
Ava grins at me and gets up, tossing her napkin on the table. “I’ve got to go too. There’s some work at the prison that I need to catch up on.”
Christian smiles at my parents. “It was nice to formally meet both of you.”
As he stands and takes my hand, my heart starts to race.
I consider sitting back down and smoothing this over, but it’s not going to happen.
This is the first step in showing them that while I may be part of this family, I’m also my own person.
I need to live life for myself.
Christian follows me out of the restaurant, grinning as we step outside into the cool night air. “That seemed like it went better than you thought it would.”
I laugh as I look at him. “You think that leaving before the wine even got to the table means that dinner went better than I thought it would?”
He shrugs as the valet goes to get his car. “The night could have gone much worse.”
“I don’t think the night’s over yet.” I squeeze his hand as the car rolls to a stop in front of us. “I want to do something. Go somewhere. Order some greasy food that my mother would be ashamed of me for eating and then spend the night watching the stars.”
Christian tips the valet and takes the keys from him. “And where do you want to go?”
“Take me to the beach.”
17
CHRISTIAN
Zoe is quiet as we drive to the beach.
I don’t bother to ask what’s on her mind. I already know. She is worried about what a life with me will look like.
I would be worried about it too if I were her.
She doesn’t know how to be with both sides of me.
To be honest, I don’t know how to live with them most of the time either. When the monster comes out of me, I feel like I’m no better than my father.
I never wanted to be like him, but somehow, I ended up there anyway. Which is another reason that I want to get away from this life.
The monster is the top of the food chain. It is a necessity if I want to survive and protect my people.
But I’m so sick of him. So tired. I wish I could retire that side of me once and for all.
My eyes take Zoe in.
I hate that she has to live with him too now.
I don’t like having to put her through that, even though it’s necessary.
