Page 30 of Where We Belong


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Cam could see how it would make things awkward. ‘If it’s an ongoing issue with her father, then it’s probably not going to be that much of a surprise for her.’

‘True.’ Hope wandered on for a bit, then turned back to face him. ‘Family is such a lottery, don’t you think? They shape everything about us and yet we get no say in it until it’s often too late.’

‘There are lots of different kinds of a privilege, just as there are many different types of deprivation. My family didn’t have a lot of money, but I grew up in a stable household full of love and laughter. I saw a lot of my school friends go off the rails because they weren’t so lucky.’ He thought about Scott, who had all the advantages his father’s wealth could buy him but not the one thing the poor kid craved – approval. ‘It’s not about being rich or poor, either, well, not always, although financial stability isn’t something to be taken lightly.’

‘Some of us get dealt a handful of aces from the start, and I’ve always been aware of that,’ Hope said, her expression thoughtful. ‘I know I have more than most people ever dream of.’

‘And yet?’ He didn’t know what had made him ask the question, only that she seemed to be searching for something.

She hesitated, then sighed. ‘My father died when I was young. I never knew him – not even his name. It didn’t bother me when I was little because I always had Ziggy around to fill the gap. I went through a phase of being curious when I was a teenager, even went so far as to search for my birth certificate, but his name was never recorded. I hadn’t even realised until last night that my parents had been married at some point.’

The reason for her sleepless night began to dawn on him. ‘And now we’ve come along and started poking around in your family history, it’s making you wonder about him?’

Hope started to nod, then shook her head. ‘I finally got Mum to open up about him and it’s… well, let’s just say it’s a lot to get my head around. And then there’s whatever was going on between her and Ziggy last night about my great-grandfather.’ She rubbed her forehead. ‘I want to know and yet given some of the stuff Mum told me last night, maybe I’m better off leaving it alone.’

‘I hate to see you so stressed out. Look, if you’re worried that Barnie is going to uncover something that you don’t want anyone else to know about, then just say the word and I’ll call off his search through the archives. We can just survey the site and try and uncover whatever is there and report our technical findings. We should be able to at least date what we find to a reasonable approximation and find out whether it’s connected to the rest of the ruins up there. Whatever connection your family might have to the site can be left for another time. Or we don’t have to try and tie the two things together – even presuming there is actually a connection. Like I said before, the stuff Barnie and I have been thinking about is definitely on the wilder side of the speculation index.’

‘But would you be happy with that?’ Hope asked, folding her arms around her middle. She looked tired and fragile, and he wanted to pull her close.

‘I’ll be happy with whatever makes you comfortable with us being here,’ he promised her. Sure, he’d harboured hopes of finding enough of interest on the estate to publish his findings, but some things were more important than his career ambitions.

She seemed to consider that for a long time before she tilted her head to look up at him. ‘I didn’t mean to drag you into my personal drama.’

Unable to help himself, Cam reached out and brushed aside a hair that had got caught on her eyelashes. ‘I can handle a little drama, don’t worry.’

‘I’m glad one of us can.’ She locked eyes with him, and Cam wished he knew what to say. He wanted to offer her comfort, to reassure her once again that her secrets were safe with him, to put his arms around her and pull her close because he didn’t think he’d seen anyone more in need of a hug than she was right then. He did none of those things, however, because it wasn’t his place. After a long moment, Hope set her shoulders and the tiredness seemed to melt off her. ‘Come on, if that offer for dinner is still open, I’m starving.’

She held out her hand to him and it felt like the most natural thing in the world to take it. She kept their fingers entwined for the rest of the walk back to the lodge, only letting go so they could fold back the patio doors. Without discussing it, they made their way into the kitchen and started preparing dinner, moving in a rhythm that made it seem like it was something they’d done a hundred times before. Hope scrubbed the potatoes while he took the steak out of the fridge to take the chill off before they cooked it. He was out on the patio lighting the barbeque when she came out with the steak and potatoes on a plate, a beer bottle and a tall glass balanced in her other hand. He took the beer with a smile of thanks then set the plate on the table next to the barbeque. ‘It needs a few minutes yet, do you want me to sort out some snacks?’

Hope shook her head as she settled back on her lounger. ‘No, I can wait.’ Cam bent to sit on the lounger next to hers, but Hope shifted her legs to the side and patted the edge of hers. ‘Come and sit with me.’

He perched on the side of the lounger, facing towards her, his free hand braced on the other side of her legs. ‘I’m not sure this is a good idea.’ He gestured between them with his bottle of beer.

‘No, you’re probably right.’ Hope took a long sip from her drink, then set it aside. She regarded him for a long moment. ‘If you’re worried this is about me using you because I’m in need of comfort, then don’t be. I like you, Cam, and I think you like me too. Are we really going to spend the whole summer pretending otherwise?’

Cam’s gut clenched in response while his brain ran a quick pros versus cons exercise. Pros – she was gorgeous, smart, funny and intriguing. Cons… come on brain, list those cons… All he could come up with was the difference in their background and the fact she was technically going to be his boss for the next few weeks. The background thing didn’t need to be an issue if he didn’t make it one, and she along with the rest of her family had been nothing but welcoming to him. He thought about the way her mother and her aunt had been sitting at the kitchen table having a coffee with their cleaner; about the things Hope had said about her uncle’s altruism and determination to run the estate for the benefit of the whole community, not just to boost the family coffers.

Hope gave him a wry smile, shaking her head as she reached for her drink again. ‘I won’t be offended if you say no.’

Cam took her hand before she could grasp hold of her drink, brought it to his lips and pressed a soft kiss to the centre of her palm. ‘I wasn’t working out how to say no, I was working out what I’d be saying yes to.’ He turned her hand over in his, stroking his thumb over the spot where he’d just kissed her. ‘I don’t want things to get complicated between us and put the project at risk.’

‘I’m not talking about anything serious,’ she interrupted and scooted down the lounger until they were sitting hip to hip. ‘I just thought we could have a little fun together, that’s all.’

It would be so easy to let himself believe her. To fall into a kiss, into the heat of her, and not give a damn for the consequences. He wanted to, God knows, he wanted to more than he’d wanted anything before in his life. But he couldn’t pretend this would be something casual for him. He’d been there, done that and he was tired of meaningless flings. He liked Hope, liked her a lot and he wasn’t prepared to pretend otherwise, even if that meant missing out on any chance of being with her. Reaching out, he took a stray curl and brushed it back behind her ear, letting his fingers steal a caress of the soft skin on her neck. ‘But I’m not sure I can do this and not get serious about you,’ he murmured. ‘What I’m starting to feel for you is—’

Whatever he’d been about to say vanished in a flash of heat as Hope leaned forward and pressed her lips to his. Cam froze for a second, letting the reality of the moment sink in before he curled his hand around her nape and let the ebb and flow of their kiss wash his lingering doubts away. Maybe it was risky given how closely they’d have to work together over the coming weeks, but as she opened beneath him and he deepened their kiss, he couldn’t bring himself to care. She felt so good in his arms, like it was where she’d always belonged.

When they broke for air, Hope looked a little dazed and Cam couldn’t help a little smile of satisfaction that he’d been the one to put that expression on her face.

‘Rowena said you were a still-waters-run-deep kind of man, and she was right.’

Cam huffed out a laugh, pushing out some of the tension in his body at the same time. He wanted to take his time with Hope, really enjoy getting to know her rather than falling into bed straight away. ‘You’ve been talking about me, have you?’

Hope flopped onto her back with a laugh. ‘Maybe.’ She held out her hand and though he wanted to accept her invitation more than anything else right then, he forced himself to his feet. ‘I think we should finish getting dinner ready, don’t you?’

When she gave him a puzzled frown, Cam leaned down and pulled her to her feet. ‘I’m trying very hard to be on my best behaviour,’ he told her, before dropping a teasing kiss on her mouth. ‘Let me prove to you I know how to be a gentleman.’

She cupped his cheek. ‘You have nothing to prove to me, Cameron Ferguson.’

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