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The last thing Raider remembered before he passed out in his Seth’s arms was Seth kissing the back of his neck and whispering, “It’s okay, baby. I’ve got you.”
***
Raider sat cross legged at the edge of the blankets in the predawn dimness. He was rolling his left shoulder to loosen it and staring north across the desert, where the rocky landscape was emerging in ghostly mounds as the night faded. He didn’t look east, where the sky was paling. Where they were headed.
They would reach Aqarat this afternoon. What the hell was that going to mean?
What the hell did this thing between him and Seth mean? What was this thing between them?
The blankets shifted behind him as Seth stirred. Raider listened to the small, intimate sounds of Seth waking up: the deeper inhalations, the light groan as he stretched, the grunt as he levered himself into a sitting position.
When Seth scooted across the blankets toward him, Raider stiffened. He didn’t mean to, but he couldn’t help it. Seth sat behind him, extending his legs on either side of him and laying light fingers on Raider’s left shoulder. When Raider pulled his shoulder away, Seth’s fingers gently stroked the back of Raider’s neck.
“Let me help,” Seth said, his voice rough with sleep.
Raider drew up his knees and hooked his elbows around them, annoyed that Seth wouldn’t just let him deal with it on his own but also …
Embarrassed.
Raider was never embarrassed, and he didn’t like the feeling. But he didn’t understand what had happened last night, and it had left him feeling exposed in a way he wasn’t used to, worse even than when Seth had witnessed his nightmares. Something about the way Seth had fucked him—no, made love to him—had stirred up a mess of weird, confusing feelings.
“Why won’t you let me help?” Seth asked.
“I don’t know. I don’t know what’s wrong with me. I don’t know why I reacted like that. Last night. After.”
Seth took a deep breath. He was silent for a while. His hand had drifted down Raider’s back. That hand moved up and stroked the back of Raider’s neck again as he said, “Because you’ve had some hard days, that’s why.”
Raider’s throat tightened. “Maybe.”
“Let me do this. Please.”
When Seth’s fingers slid from Raider’s nape to his shoulder, Raider sighed and gave in. He let his knees fall open as Seth massaged his shoulder. Seth hunted down knotted muscles, kneading them until they released. Then he started stretching Raider’s shoulder, manipulating it in ways Raider wasn’t used to.
He grunted as Seth hooked their elbows together and pulled his arm back while exerting pressure on his shoulder blade.
“Fuck, Seth.”
“Just breathe.”
Raider made himself take a few deep breaths. When Seth finally relented and eased Raider’s arm, Raider rolled it experimentally.
“Huh,” he huffed, surprised.
“Did that help?”
“Yeah. It did. A lot.”
“Good.”
Seth’s fingers moved to Raider’s other shoulder then his neck. None of that hurt as much and the touch had Raider grunting and moaning and leaning back into Seth, where he felt the ridge of Seth’s erection.
“Sorry,” Seth muttered. “I can’t help it.”
Raider took Seth’s right hand and pulled it around his waist, guiding it to his own hard cock.
“Mmm,” Seth murmured as his hand curled around Raider’s shaft, stroking leisurely.
Raider let his legs fall open further as Seth explored lower, massaging Raider’s swollen balls. His other arm hooked possessively around Raider’s torso. Raider let his head fall back on Seth’s shoulder. He loved this. He fucking loved this.
