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“No,” I said. “Seriously, did you borrow this from a friend?”
Because that would be more reasonable and something that happens in real life, I thought when we made it to the bottom of the hill, and he was focused on getting over to the left lane of the street to make a U-turn toward the freeway.
“So, here’s the situation,” he said, looking over at me while we waited at a red light. “I’ve been in the market to get another vehicle, anyway, so before you judge, hear that part first.”
“I’m not judging. I’m just curious.”
“Rightfully so,” he said as the light turned green, and he looked back at the road. “Anyway, while I was buying shit for our camping trip so that your cute little ass could sleep comfortably in your own personal tent,” he paused and glanced over, feigning reproach with his arched eyebrow.
“I would’ve bought my own,” I answered truthfully.
“Right, Little Miss Student Loan Debt. And I would’ve been such a gentleman for insisting we overnight camp so long as you bought and brought your own tent?”
“Thank you for the tent,” I said with a laugh as he sped up to merge with traffic on the freeway.
“My pleasure,” he teased.
“So, back to why you bought a brand new 4Runner?”
“Ah,” he said, settling into his leather seat and kicking on the cruise control. “Well, I had to have something to haul all this gear, and my buddies insisted that the new 4Runner TRD Premium Edition was the way to go.” He glanced at me for a reaction, and I don’t think I had an expression to offer him after that. “So, I bought all this shit at REI and dropped the Ferrari off at home. Then I took an Uber to the dealership, plucked their showroom model, signed papers, picked up this camping shit, and now, here we are. I’m the happiest mother fucker I know since getting this gal,” he said, rubbing the dash.
“Okay,” I answered, unsure if I should crack a joke or jump ship now because I had no idea what this guy was all about.
“Don’t fry your beautiful brain cells over it,” he said with a bright smile and a laugh. “I’m just the type to handle my business and get what I want.”
The guy was obviously loaded with money. Who in God’s name bought a new SUV just to haul around camping equipment that didn’t fit in their Ferrari?
“Who the hell are you? A long-lost Kardashian?”
“Hardly,” he grinned at me. “Those ladies order their vehicles customized. I just ran down to the dealership, snatched up the most badass-looking 4Runner I could, and?—”
“How much was this thing?” I questioned, wondering how wealthy this man could be.
“Eighty-three thousand,” he said as if he’d just told me how much he’d paid for a pair of jeans.
“You’re insane,” I said how I truly felt. “But it is pretty cute to see you looking like a high school kid who just got handed the keys to his dad’s new truck.”
“Ha,” he said, flipping on his blinker and darting across four lanes to get to the connecting freeway that would bring us out of the city. “I love it. I finally feel like a normal person for doing this. You know?”
Did he just say he felt like a normal person for doing the most abnormal thing I could imagine?
“You can’t be serious. Normal? I’m sure you mean something else.”
“No, I meant what I said,” he corrected me. “I’ve never been able to enjoy the fruits of my labor. You remember I told you I grew up in a wealthy family, correct?”
“Yes,” I answered, wondering where this could be going in his happy little mind.
“Well, in my family, there are rules for how we spend our money.” He glanced at me to see if I was still with him, “The first and most important rule is that we use it wisely.”
“And the second?” I said because I still didn’t see where there was any wisdom in the way he went about purchasing this SUV.
“Second, we don’t make a big deal over our purchases.”
“You mean, you don’t brag?” I said with a soft laugh.
“Precisely,” he answered. “And for the first time in my life, I made a completely foolish purchase and bought the one vehicle that makes me stand out.”
“Wow,” I said, somehow finding this all too funny. “It looks like you’ve rebelled from your spoiled rich boy ways in the most flamboyant way possible.”
