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The way he said my name nearly killed me. There was exasperation in his tone, but there was also longing. It made me remember the way he would say my name in bed.
I laid my hand on his arm. “I didn’t want to leave you.”
He snarled at me as he pulled his arm free. “Then you could have made other choices.”
I couldn’t have though, other than actually leaving him for dead.
6
CARTER
Istared at Matteo as he opened the door and stepped out of my SUV. I hated the way his touch had sent lightning racing through me. I didn’t want to feel anything for him, and I sure as hell didn’t want to be sitting here half hard, remembering how good he could make me feel.
He stood on the porch looking back at me. Shit. I needed to get out of the vehicle and get him into the cabin where I could question him. I was going to sit down and talk to him like a civilized human being. I needed answers, then I needed to get my revenge. On the cartel? On the CIA? Or just on Matteo?
I wasn’t sure anymore.
I unlocked the door and stepped inside, expecting Matteo to follow me. When he didn’t. I turned to face him, then wished I hadn’t. The smirk on his face reminded me too much of the first night I’d gone to hm, let him fuck me, let him destroy me. “What are you doing?”
“Seeing if you can make me go inside.”
“Goddamn it, Matteo.” I grabbed his shirt and yanked him inside. He stumbled into me, letting me know he’d had no intention of resisting. I drove him against the wall. We glared at each other, heat racing between us. I couldn’t breathe, couldn’t think. My cock throbbed, threatening to rip though my pants.
Do it, the evil part of my brain said. I resisted. This was so fucking wrong. I couldn’t still want him.
Then he licked his lips, and I was gone. I kissed him, brutalizing his lips, wanting to punish him, but needing to feel the heat of his mouth.
He gave in, relaxing against the wall and opening to me. When I finally pulled back, the bastard grinned at me.
“Is this why you brought me out here? To have your wicked way with me? Are you thinking about that first night?”
“Fuck you.”
“That’s an option.”
“You’re trying to play me.”
“Does it matter? You can get your revenge on me. You’re not going to kill me, and this will be much more fun.”
I wrapped one hand around his throat and slapped the other over his mouth. “Shut. Up.”
He nodded, faking contrition. I took my hand away from him mouth, but I squeezed his throat harder. Voice croaky, he said. “I can think of another way you could choke me. I always did love the taste of your cock.”
I took about two seconds to consider his offer. I was playing with fire. I needed answers from him, but I couldn’t trust him.
Never trust a spy.
I could tell myself that letting him suck me off would clear my head and maybe get rid of the driving need to fuck him so I could figure out how the hell to handle this situation, but I knew better. It would only make me want him more. But he wasn’t a traitor, right? I could let myself have this. I could hate fuck him, use him the way he’d used me. I could enjoy that. I deserved it.
I undid my pants. He watched me, eyes wide. When I pulled out my cock, he fucking sighed like he’d missed it that much. When his eyes met mine, he looked dazed. Shit, was he really that far gone, that desperate for this, for me? Did he actually have feelings?
No. Hate fucking him was bad enough. Letting myself think there could be anything more could be deadly.
Matteo sank to his knees without me telling him too. I remembered how startled I’d been the first time he’d sucked me off. The way he acted so fucking dominant, demanding to be in charge, to take me, to force whatever he wanted, I hadn’t thought he’d be willing to suck dick.
I’d been so wrong. He fucking reveled in it. He worshiped my cock, and he could take it all down his throat. I’d never felt anything like it, and I hadn’t had anyone’s mouth that even compared to his since.
I used my hands to brace myself on the wall so I was leaning over him. He sank back on his heels and opened his mouth as he gripped my cock and slid his lips over the head. I pushed forward. “You said I should choke you, so take it all.”
