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I rose up on my knees and Matteo cupped my face in his hands and kissed me. It wasn’t like the other kisses we’d shared and nothing like the way he’d devoured me when we were outside. It was tender, soft, and slow, yet just as all-consuming, I thought I might pass out before he pulled back.
“You need to eat,” he scolded.
“I know.”
“I want you to have plenty of strength later.”
“I….”
“What, baby?”
The words stuck again, and I shook my head.
He smiled. “You’ll say it when you’re ready.”
Fuck, he knew. I nodded and got to my feet even though my legs were shaking. I made it to my chair, sat down, and we finished our meal mostly in silence.
Matteo insisted on cleaning up everything, then we settled on the couch with his arm around me and my head on his chest.
“We’re going to have to talk about your family.”
I nodded. “I know.” I tried to think about my family as little as possible, but he deserved to know more if we were going to make things last between us.
“Carter?”
I sighed and sat up, running a hand through my hair. “This isn’t easy. I don’t like talking about them or even thinking about them.”
“Do you think they could be behind all this?”
I squeezed my eyes shut, wishing I could make the whole situation go away. When I looked at him again, I nodded. “Yes.”
“Then talk to me.”
“My mom died when I was five. There was an accident. She fell down the stairs, but I’ve always wondered if my dad pushed her. He had plenty of reasons to want her gone.”
“Oh, baby, I’m so sorry,” Matteo pulled me to him, holding me tightly. “If we find out he did it, we will get revenge.”
“Thanks.” I let him hold me for a few moments before I sat back. “I need to look at you when I say these things.”
“Only if you want to. I’m happy to hold you while you talk.”
I shook my head. “I need to do it this way.” I couldn’t explain why, but I had hidden all of this for so long. Even Miles, Ford, and Worth didn’t know the whole story of what I’d gone through. They just knew that things were bad, and I hated to be at home.
“Do you want a drink?” Matteo asked.
I did, but I wasn’t going to have one. “Not now. Maybe after.” Although what I would likely need after I explained was be taken by him again, hard enough to make me forget all the things I had to confess.
“My father never loved any of us. He uses Landon because he wants someone to mold in his image. His marriage to my mother was arranged to unite two families and their money. As far as I could tell, he hated me. I…I’m not actually his son and he resented the hell out of me for that, but he kept me around because he was obsessed with having an heir. He needed to have a backup in case anything happened to Landon. I was still groomed for taking over his position, though I was given as little of his attention as possible, and he was always made it very clear that I was inferior to my brother.”
“There is no way you are fucking inferior to him. You are amazing Carter. You’re strong, smart, talented, and?—”
I held up hand. “You don’t have to go on. I know I’m not weak like he told me I was. I proved that to myself in high school, and even more so in the SEALs. Neither him nor Landon would have been able to make it through a day of training.”
Matteo nodded. “I’ve researched them. That’s what I did while you were gone today.”
My breath caught. I wanted to tell him he’d had no right, but most things he’d found were probably public knowledge. My dad and Landon were awful people, and I hated them. Why would I want to hide that from Matteo?
Because you think being related to them makes you just as bad.
