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My cell phone bleeps, and I check my text messages.
Summer has texted me.
I just robbed a bank. Want to go shopping?
I smile wryly and send a reply by sending a string of handcuff icons, then three emojis of frowning police officers, and finally a picture of a jail cell.
What are you up to? I ask her.
Mom’s at work and I’m bored.
I chew my lower lip. I feel really bad for her mother working so much. I wish I could help them out financially, but I’m a scholarship student myself, and even if I had money, I don’t know if her mother would accept it.
I send her another text. Go do some research. Send me a list of 10 women authors, and I will buy you one ice cream.
You’ll buy me ice cream anyway. You’re trying to get on my good side.
True, but do it. I have to go study now. No more bank robbing!!!
She sends me a shrugging emoji.
I walk over to sit on the opposite end of the bed from Nick, grab my notebook, and flip it open to start quizzing him.
We last about two minutes before he groans and shakes his head. “I hate this shit so much. It’s so boring. Why did I even major in English? Damn it, I thought it would be the easiest major. I mean, everyone speaks English, right?”
I put my hand over my mouth so I don’t laugh out loud. There are so many things wrong with what he just said, I don’t even know how to begin.
He just officially made my list of least attractive men on the planet.
Another five minutes, and he’s slowly scooting his way down the bed towards me, and I’m edging farther away from him. If I go much farther, my butt’s going to be on the floor. “This is boring,” he whines again.
“So is being kicked off the football team,” I say.
My phone rings just then, and I leap up to grab it. It’s my sister.
“Study,” I yell at Nick.
“Yes, ma’am,” he says.
I go out into the hall so I can talk to her privately.
“Are you with it? I mean, him?” she asks, disgust dripping from her voice.
“Yes, we’re picking out wedding cakes. Do you prefer buttercream? I like buttercream.”
“Stop,” she groans. “Don’t do this to me.”
“Moving on to the names of our babies. I’m thinking it might be twins, so Nick wants to go with Beavis and Butthead. Do you have any thoughts on this? I’ve only got seven months left to decide. If it’s girls, he wants Barbie Lee and Bambi Jo, and there have to be little hearts over the I’s. That has to be on the birth certificate.”
“Mason,” Rowan yells. “We’re kidnaping Ruby and taking her to a deprogramming center.”
“I’ll get the car.” I can hear Mason in the background.
“In all seriousness, Ruby, there is genuinely something off about the guy, and I don’t trust him at all.” Rowan sounds exasperated.
She’s like a bulldog with a bone when she fixates on something, and I don’t want to spend all day arguing with her.
“Okay, you want the truth?” I ask her.
