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When he leaves, she frowns at me. “Don’t buy me food.”
“It’s part of the whole boyfriend experience, pookie-pie.”
“No.” She shakes her head.
“Snuggle bug? Cuddle puss?”
She makes a gagging sound. “So, moving on.” She frowns at me. “You’re right, though; there are some things we should clarify. How long are we going to keep up this charade?”
I give what I hope looks like a casual shrug. “I’m thinking until the end of the summer. Make it look like we really gave it the old college try. Then we break up and issue a statement about how we’ll always remain friends.”
She nods.
I feel an odd pang in my chest. This is not forever.
I am going to make her see what a terrible mistake she made in dumping me for a football jock, and then I am going to stroll off into the sunset.
I smile at her fiercely. “Anyway, since you’re my girlfriend now, I have a list of girlfriend things for you to do. I want you to pick up my dry cleaning and bring it to my apartment tomorrow, for starters.”
“Are you kidding me?” she hisses.
I blink at her with a wounded look. “Hey, I thought you were grateful to me for saving you from a life of breaking rocks in the hot sun.”
“This is New York City. People get arrested three hundred times and don’t spend any time in jail. I’d get a fine and a criminal record.” She grimaces. “And kicked out of school. And that record would haunt me for life. Okay, I am grateful, but you don’t need me to pick up your dry cleaning. You can afford to pay for a personal assistant for that kind of thing. My sister could find you one; she’s good at that stuff.”
I grin fiercely. “But this makes you look like my girlfriend. I’ve already tipped off the paparazzi that you’re doing this for me. They’ll swoon.”
I reach into my pants pocket and pull out the list I’ve scribbled.
“Here you go. That’s everything I’m going to have you do for me this week.”
Her breath rushes out in an exasperated hiss. “I will have my revenge.”
“You’ll try. You’ll fail.”
“If that’s what you think, then you don’t know me very well.”
A flare of heat swells up inside me. “I certainly don’t know you as well as I thought I did.” The image of her and Nick together swims in front of my eyes, and I bite down on an ugly response.
“Likewise. And okay, I’ll pick up your stupid dry cleaning.”
I point at the list.
She reads it and sighs. “And your groceries. And bring you coffee and donuts. And I will go to the Rovers store and buy a jersey with your number on it and wear it out of the shop. Oh my God, are there going to be paparazzi waiting for me then too?”
“What do you think?”
“I hate you so much right now.”
I lean in close. “It’ll get worse. Prepare for a long, hot summer.”
She’s so close to me I could kiss her now. Her blue eyes are blazing with fury, her lips pink and full...
“Hey! Ruby!”
Ruby straightens up abruptly. A skinny kid with brown hair and patched jeans is making her way towards the table, accompanied by an older woman.
“Oh, shi—” Ruby coughs into her hand. “Ships sail on the ocean,” she corrects herself quickly.
