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Knox brushes my hair behind my ear. His fingers drag along my cheek with a comforting warmth. A five o’clock shadow covers his jaw, a sign he didn’t shave this morning before our hike. Unbelievably, our hike happened today. It feels like days ago.
“I should’ve never come here.”
He cups my face between his strong hands and tilts my chin until I’m looking directly into his serious, commanding eyes. “You are exactly where you should be. We’re going to find Sloane. And I’m going to keep you safe.”
“But at what cost?”
“At all costs. That’s what Sam would want. That’s why he sent you to me. He knew.”
My heart skips under the warmth of his gaze. He dips his head, his lashes flutter closed, and he presses his lips to mine.
I reach for him, for his shoulder, the curly hair at the base of his neck, and he maneuvers us so we’re lying down across the width of the bed, side by side. Much like the sofa, only I’m not straddling him. His hand warms my waist, the exposed skin cool. He slides down, bunching my shirt as he moves.
He’s propped up on an elbow, and I’m below him. Kissing him. Reality dissipates. The warmth along my ribs spreads, and his thumb drags across the bottom of my bra.
Holy shit. He’s touching my bra.
His lips caress my neck. Just his lips touching my skin has me breaking out in goosebumps. The rough stubble of his jaw sands my skin. His nail scratches against the underside of my breast. My thighs squeeze together. His teeth tug on my bottom lip. And the bra gets pushed higher. Along with my shirt.
A chill falls over me. My chest squeezes. Panic lurks. It’s too much. I’m up and off the bed and out the door. My breaths come in quick, short bursts.
Through the large window in the den, a large yellow ball, the sun, descends below the navy horizon. I focus on the sun. On my breathing.
I sense rather than see him.
“Hey.” He’s timid. And he shouldn’t be. This is all me. But it’s also…what are we even doing? I should be concerned about my sister. And Jimmy. “I’m sorry. I should’ve never…”
If he saw me, he’d realize how true of a statement that is.
“Are you okay?”
“I’m fine. And I’m sorry about… It’s…ah.” Jeez, I must come off as such a tease. “I’m sorry.”
“What are you sorry about?”
How to answer that? For not knowing what I’m doing. I’m acting like I want to do more with him and yet…I absently rub my chest. He’s speaking to me, but what I feel is Brandon’s disgust. Clothed, I’m all right, but…and it doesn’t matter. “We need to focus on finding Sloane.”
I swallow. Glance to the kitchen.
“Are you getting hungry? Let’s see what’s in the kitchen.” My muscles stretch with the length of each extension of my leg, heel to toe, shoulders back, arms at my side for balance. Distance. I’m losing my mind. It’s a highly unusual situation and I’m losing my mind. Prioritize. “When do you think we’ll hear about Jimmy?”
“Soon.”
I open the refrigerator and glance Knox’s way. He’s standing in the middle of the room. There’s no phone in his hand. He’s watching me.
I implore him with my eyes. Trust me. You don’t want me. You don’t want this. I might bring out your protective instincts. I do that to people. But you don’t want me. I’m a mess with a pending expiration date. And if I get sick again, it’s not good for anyone. Drop this. I am not what you want.
He sighs, bows his head and plods to the bedroom.
I let out a matching sigh of relief. He heard me.
CHAPTER 19
Knox
A chill permeates the evening air. Two reclining chairs and a small table with four seats beckon but sitting isn’t on the agenda. The overhang on the deck screens the inside view. I’ve checked every angle from the beach and the side of the house.
Once we’re in for the night, I’ll lock up and set the alarm. In an ideal world, we would go for a stroll along the beach and take in the stars. Truth is, we could probably get away with it, but I won’t chance it.
