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“You’re incredible,” I reply, crawling up beside him to kiss his forehead. And I try not to think about what he said because I hate the thought of him not knowing how amazing something like that can feel. He should know that. Someone should be loving him. Worshipping his body like he deserves.
I lie next to him and pull the blankets up over his body. And without prompting, he turns and snuggles into me. He looks so content that I almost don’t say anything. But I have to know. “Can I ask you something?”
“You don’t have to ask my permission to do anything,” Rhys answers. His muscles tense just a little when he says that, so I lay a hand on his back, running my fingers along his spine until he relaxes again.
“Do you ever think about quitting what you do?” I’m afraid it comes out wrong, like I’m judging him or something. But he doesn’t sound mad when he responds.
“Sometimes. But to be honest, I’ve been doing this so long, I think it’d feel a little weird to do anything else.” He swallows and traces a small pattern on my chest. “It’s why I haven’t dated. I don’t think it’s fair to date someone when I’m fucking other people, you know?”
“Do you think you’d date if you stopped?”
“No.” His answer is swift. “To be honest…I’m not sure I could find someone who’d want me after…everything.”
“Maybe you haven’t looked at the right guy yet.”
He glances up at me. “You don’t even know everything, Parker. Trust me, there are things that would make anyone run away.”
He sounds so sad when he says that. And I realize it’s not just something he thinks. At some point in time, someone said something to him that made him think that. Someone did something to him that made him feel unworthy. And that thought breaks my heart.
Instead of saying anything else, I just pull him closer to me. I’m beginning to realize it doesn’t matter what he tells me or what he’s done. I’ll still want to be with him.
***
An hour later, when I let Cameron into my apartment, I can tell immediately that something’s wrong. I thought I sensed it in the text but looking at his face now, I know.
“What is it?” I ask, closing the door as soon as he’s inside.
He glances at Rhys on the couch. “We should talk alone.”
“Okay.” I tell Rhys we’ll be back in a minute, then follow my brother back into my bedroom. The curtains are still drawn, and unlike he usually does, Cameron doesn’t make a move to pull them open and let in the sunlight.
“Dad’s out,” Cameron says, his voice blunt.
My stomach curls into a knot. “What?”
“Got out this morning on good behavior,” he continues. “I’m hoping he won’t come near us, but we can’t know for sure. So be careful. And, Parker, if you see him, I want you to call me immediately. Don’t keep it from me like last time.”
All the warmth I got from being with Rhys a little while ago vanishes. I try to swallow, but my throat doesn’t want to work. Our father was arrested and charged with armed robbery before I’d decided if I wanted to go forward about the beatings he gave me. He was supposed to be locked away for thirteen years. How the hell did he get out in only eight?
“I’m sorry, Parker.” Cameron’s blunt tone softens. “What do you want to do?”
“I-I don’t know what you mean.” There’s nothing he can do. He may have gotten rich from his company, but he can’t throw a man back in prison.
“We can go to the police and file a report about what happened when you were a teenager. I checked, and it’s too late to file anything about the physical abuse, but we could still get a restraining order against him.”
“No. That would only piss him off.” I already knew the statute of limitations had run out on that. But I’d expected to be another five years older when he got out. Almost thirty. I’d expected to feel stronger.
“What do you want me to do?” Cameron asks quietly. There’s a promise in his voice, like I could ask him to hire a hitman to take Dad out, and he would. But I’d never do anything to get Cameron in trouble. It’s not worth it.
“There’s nothing we can do,” I reply, thankful that my voice is steady. “It’s fine.”
He studies my face, reading everything I’m not saying. It’s not fine. It sucks that he’s already back out and can get at me again. And it doesn’t matter that I’m twenty-three now. When I think about my father, I’m fifteen again.
“Hey.” Cameron reaches up and squeezes my shoulder tightly. “It’s gonna be okay. If he comes near you again, I’ll kill him, all right?”
I nod even though I would never want Cam to do something that’d get him locked away for life.
He gives me a bracing smile and releases me. Then he says, “So who’s the guy out there? Because he kind of looks like the date Phil brought to the party the other night.”
