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“You had a crush on me in high school,” Tomás said.
I groaned, burying my head in my hands. “And you thought you needed to bring that up, why? It’s embarrassing as fuck, you know?”
“‘Cause I have a crush on you too.”
He’d said it so softly that at first, I thought I had dreamed it. But when he stayed still, I looked up. He was serious. “W-what did you say?”
“I’m in love with you. I realized it this morning when we were… Remember when I had that moment during sex? That’s when it hit me.”
“You’re in love with me.” My mouth made the words, but my brain was still processing them.
“Yes, I am.”
“I’m… Are you… I don’t know what to say.”
“You believe me?”
“You wouldn’t lie about this.” That, I knew with one hundred percent certainty. “I guess I have a hard time believing you could fall for me.”
“You’re amazing, Fir. You’re kind and sweet, and you work so hard, dedicating yourself to your kids and this town. You care for people, including me, and…” He threw up his hands. “I never expected this to happen. I told you I wasn’t interested in relationships. Joke is on me because it turns out I am when it’s with you. I love what we have, meu amor, but I want more. I want everything with you.”
“Meu amor,” I said.
“It means my love.”
“That’s what you called me last night when I fell asleep.”
“I’ve never called anyone that. Ever.”
“When you say everything, what do you mean?”
“I mean everything, Fir. Everything you can give me.”
I’d known Tomás since we’d been toddlers, but I’d never spotted this look on his face before. It was as if he’d removed a veil from his face, as if he allowed me to see something no one else ever had. Because if he’d looked at me like that before, I would have known. I would have known beyond a shadow of a doubt that he loved me. His eyes gave it away. They held such softness, such tenderness tears sprang to my eyes. “I come with a considerable amount of baggage.”
He shook his head. “Not baggage. You have two wonderful kids, who I hope to get to know better, though I’d understand if you want to wait to introduce me. And you had an amazing husband, who I will never try to replace. I’m in awe of what you two shared, and I’d never try to erase that. But I hope you’d be willing to give me a chance, to give us a chance.”
I cupped his cheek. “Tomás, I don’t want to question your intentions, but I need you to understand you can’t do this lightly. If I do this with you, if I open myself up… You can break my heart, shatter it into a million pieces. I can’t…” My voice broke. “I can’t do this unless you’re one hundred percent sure. My heart won’t survive losing you too.”
“Does that mean you want more with me too?”
Shit. I should’ve led with that. “Yes, I do. When you came back into my life, that old crush resurfaced with a vengeance. I’m in love with you too, Tomás. On some level, I always have been.”
The tight lines on his face relaxed. “Thank you.”
“Not sure that’s something to thank me for. It’s not like I had a choice,” I said with a laugh.
He took my hands and pressed a kiss on each in an old-fashioned romantic gesture that had my belly all aflutter. “I promise I won’t hurt you, meu amor. Not on purpose anyway. I’m serious about this. So serious I…”
“That you what?”
He took a deep breath. “I’m retiring too.”
“What?”
“Tiago was right. It’s been enough. We’ve had a fantastic career, but it’s time to call it a day.”
“I don’t want you to quit for me. I’m not asking you to.”
