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Junior frowned, angling his body forward. “Liability fee?”
His sunglasses perched on top of his nose.
Indoors.
Had Oliver arrived in his wife pleaser, he still wouldn’t be the worst dressed in the room.
“Yes, liability. I’m sure you’re familiar with the word, seeing as your existence sums it up.” Reluctantly, I turned to look at Junior. “Your company serves people who let others watch them suck toes and grind against public subway seats. This whole operation is a lawsuit waiting to happen. Therefore, I reserved the money I calculated I’ll need to hose the legal fecal matter off Dot Cum when shit hits the fan.”
Jasper tilted his head, reaching for his wine before remembering Ollie had stolen it. “You deducted one billion dollars because of an imaginary lawsuit?”
“It’s not imaginary.” Oliver cut into his steak. “People sue companies every day. If they can find a reason to sue a diaper company, what makes you think they can’t find a good reason to piss on a site where anyone can say they’re over eighteen and create pornographic content?”
“Not to mention, ad revenue for social media companies runs in the high nineties.” I fixed the utensils arrangement Farrow had screwed with until they aligned parallel to one another. “And abouteighty percent of family-friendly corporations would never consider advertising on your platform.”
“It’ll be a bitch to bring the boys to your milkshake yard.” Romeo, who’d lost his mind almost two years ago, finished cutting his wife’s entire steak. “You can’t treat your estimated market value as a true and tested number.”
“Exactly.” Ollie snapped his fingers, receiving his martini and tipping my server a hundred bucks like he was at a restaurant. The man was as in touch with reality as a space cowboy. “Nobody wants to advertise their product next to a dick pic.”
Dallas grinned at Ollie. “Speaking of, wasn’tyourssplayed on the cover of theNew Yorker?”
The little troll.
“Well, yeah, but that is one photogenic penis.” Ollie popped a tiger prawn into his mouth. “It deserves anEsquirecover, leaning over a horse in cowboy gear.”
“I see you’ve given it some thought.”
He nodded. “Even hired an art director to give me pointers in case my beautiful penis is ever invited for a photoshoot.”
Dallas tipped a shoulder up. “Seen better.”
“You’re biased.” Ollie yawned, taking a swig of his martini like it was beer. “Another penis impregnated you. You have skin in the game.”
She patted her husband’s lap. “Rom actually has the most beautiful circumcision.”
Why were these people my friends?
Why had I not opted to live in a cave in the Alps?
I had zero desire to discuss other people’s genitalia.
“Dad.” Junior finally ripped the sunglasses off his face, stomping his gold Versace sneakers. “You can’t sell it at a bill under the market value. That’s crazy.”
Senior glanced Jasper’s way. The latter rolled his tongue along his teeth, rearranging his new glass of wine by its stem without a word.
His gaze shifted back to me. “Is one billion your best and final offer?”
“While I’m still in the race.” I laced my fingers together. “I have a terrible attention span when it comes to acquiring new companies. The industry is ever-changing. So is my mind.”
“Dad,no,” Junior pleaded, his eyes clinging to his father’s face. “They’re pressuring you, so they can rip you off. Let’s not sell. I’ll pull some more hours. This time, I’ll even come to the office every day. I swear?—”
“Shut up and let me think,” Senior barked, smacking the table.
Utensils and plates clattered. Some food rolled off the edge.
Dallas groaned. “Not the stuffed cherries.”
The catering staff burst into the room, collecting the plates from our second entrée and replacing them with fresh ones for the next round.
