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Gerry lets out a deep breath while Hailey sobs. My Momma is trying to comfort her as we all hear what Sarah has given up for her family, and I swallow hard. I knew this, and yet I fucking questioned her. I questioned her loyalty.
What the fuck is wrong with me?
"She left her teenage years be-behind for me and for our parents. For the first time since meeting you, I-I finally saw my free-spirited sister return before-before we knew I-I had leukemia."She takes another deep breath."I-I know you screwed up, and I-I know I should be telling you-you to leave her alone from-from now on, but-but she was happy and-and in love."I couldn't stop them even if I tried. My tears fall at the love this amazing girl who will be missed is showing for her sister:"She-she'll make it hard, make you work for it, and-and as you should. Fight f-for her Hunter. Make my-my Sissy happy. Give her the life she-she deserves. Make her your old-old lady and-and marry her, then name-name your firstborn after their favorite angel in the-the clouds."I sniffle and shake my head as she takes a breath, Sniper gripping my shoulder, "I-I have to go now; I-I'm so tired, and Sissy will be-be here soon to-to spend the night AGAIN. I-I love you like a big brother, Hunter. Take-take care of my best friend, please; win her-her back over."
She hangs up, and I hang my head as Sniper saves the message. My mother and Sarah's both openly sob while both my brother and father look at me like I'm some sort of ticking time bomb, and I am. Mary is right; I did fuck up, but Sarah made it perfectly clear two weeks ago that she would never take me back. I may not have touched my lips with Shelby's, but I did feel her skin; let her touch me, and I did fuck up last week, even worse.
Shaking my head, I get up and go to leave my office, keeping busy until my little spitfire wakes no longer appealing. I can feel everyone following me out and calling for me, but I ignore them. I need to hold my girl; I need her in my arms because when she wakes, she'll probably try to fucking cut my arm off. As I enter the common room, about to veer off to the hallway where the officers' rooms are, I'm stopped by a nearly undressed Celine, her pink mini dress leaving nothing to the imagination.
For fucks sake.
I sigh as she tries to speak seductively, but it comes out whiny.
"Snake, are you ready to let me back into your bed?" I scoff and go to walk around her when she grips my arm, her red nails digging in, "Seriously, Snake? The bitch lied to you; she tried to trap you, and you're still mourning your fucked-up relationship when we were together for years."
My resolve snaps as my father's "oh shit" hits my ears before I grab a hold of Celine's neck before slamming her into the wall. The club quietens and watches on as I get into her face.
"Lied, really? Because last time I checked, it was you and Shelby fucking lying out of jealousy and greed," I get closer to her face as her eyes widen in shock at my anger, "My girl's fifteen-year-old sister died today, and because I listened to your bullshit, I wasn't there for her." She gasps, but I ignore it and squeeze tightly on the grip I have on her neck, "You are no longer welcome on any club-owned property. You are no longer welcome anywhere near me. If a brother wants to fuck you, it won't be here; now you have five fucking seconds to get your skanky, lying fucking ass out of here before I slice your fucking throat open."
I squeeze a little tighter to make a point, causing her to gasp for air, her hands gripping my wrists, before I pull her away from the wall with my grip and then shove her towards the door. She cries as she stumbles before running out of my club, and I make eye contact with all my brothers. Every single one of them gives me a nod of approval before I walk down to my room.
As I shut the door behind me, my eyes instantly went to my girl. Even sedated, she looks in pain. Her face is scrunched up, and her red hair spreads out on the pillows as my heart pounds loudly.
I can't lose her, not again.
With a sigh, I take my cut off, hanging it on the door before I go to the bed and climb in behind her. Very gently, I place my left arm under her head, my right going over her waist, my fingers splayed on her flat stomach before my head goes into the crook of her neck, where I want to fucking live.
I hold her tight to me, reminding myself of the vows I'd made before I screwed up and questioned her character before I made a new one.
Winning her back and never letting her go.
Chapter 19
Sarah – One Week Later
The light breeze pushes my wavy hair forward as the rain starts to spit on the floor before me, with the canopy protecting me as the swing moves gently as I sit in a trance.
A whole week without my little sister, my best friend.
I haven't seen my parents, Annie, Hunt…I mean, Snake's Momma has stated they're okay with arranging the funeral. My dad had saved up without my mother knowing; something inside him urged him to do it when we were told her cancer had returned. Annie said Momma kicked off, but she and her old man, Bull, had jumped it and somehow managed to de-escalate the situation when normally I would have taken the brunt of it. I didn't say anything when she told me the story, though. I haven't actually spoken much in the past week. I've been at the clubhouse ever since I passed out after losing...
I shake my head a little.
I didn't want to be here, but I didn't want to be with my parents. A few days ago, I tried to sneak out, adamant about going to a motel with money I didn't have. Still, Liam had stopped me by gently gripping my arm and walking me to Snake's office before ratting me out. Snake then proceeded to threaten to handcuff me to his bed if I tried it again. Again, I didn't speak. Even looking at him hurts. He's forced me to stay in his room at the club. I'd normally fall asleep on the small armchair, unwilling to be in the same bed as him, but every morning, I find myself back in his bed, his side rustled and barely warm by the time I wake. He's another person I haven't actually seen much of since Mary... Whenever I have seen him, he hasn't said much either, like he knows I need the silence. Four times a day, he'll come into his extremely clean room, which I have not left and, as you guessed, cleaned, with food he's cooked before leaving, but not without kissing my forehead or cheek first, lingering for a few moments.
I'll manage a few bites before my stomach churns.
I blink, my eyes watering, as my hand goes to my stomach, hoping I don't have a mental breakdown.
I miss my little Tiny Dancer.
I don't really eat, and I know it's not healthy. I know I need to keep my health up, and I am trying. I just feel like I'm missing a part of myself. I spent most of my years with her, and now that she's gone, I feel like I've lost my purpose; she may have only been my sister, but she was also my best friend. Plus, being at the clubhouse around the man who broke me and his brothers, who were so quick to believe someone who would try to trap them without feeling bad, is hard, but I also know I can't go back home. If I do, my mask will come back up. I will drown trying to put my parent's mourning first, which isn't healthy for anyone. I know I can't leave without being handcuffed to Snake's bed, so I'm stuck.
A few tears fall, and I quickly wipe them away. I want Snake, and that is a hard concept to think of. He was nasty; he believed others over me, and Mary was trying to convince me to give him another chance, but now I'm conflicted.
Do I give him a chance because he holds my heart, but not right now because I'm no doormat and what he did and how he treated me was shitty, or do I give him a chance because it was my sister's last words and then I resent him because I didn't do it on my terms?
I sigh as the swing moves, closing my eyes and enjoying the slight breeze. I am slightly happy that the rain has stopped. Today will be hard enough; we don't need the rain on top of that.
