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“Will someone please explain what the fuck is going on?” Luca growls, hands cupping my shoulders as I press my forehead into his chest, soaking the fabric of his shirt, while Swift places gentle kisses against my neck.
Ethan and Maddox take turns explaining about Claudia, about how she found them in the park while they were waiting for their contact to show up. How they brought her back here so Logan could check her out and they can figure out what the hell is going on. Maddox makes a point of saying the only reason she’s here is to help understand what’s going on with me, with the things my mother told us.
He may say that, but I saw him with her. Saw him helpless against the pull of her omega whine, saw him wrap her in his arms in a way that he never did to me when I first met him. No, he was all growly and distant and demanding. And not in how omegas like.
He made it clear he didn’t want me around them, and within the first hour of being around Claudia, he was hugging her, soothing her.
How can I not think that means something?
“You saw her,” I croak out, drawing their attention to me. “She looks just how everyone imagines an omega to look. She smells like an omega. She’s older than me.” I’ve always been subpar, is what I don’t say. “I don’t act like an omega. It took meeting scent matches for me to present. Its… Doesn’t it make sense that she’s the real omega? She’s older than me. I’m just the beta they tested on.”
“You’re assuming that you were injected with omega hormones because of what your mother said. But she didn’t really know,” Logan says, lacing his fingers through mine. “It could be the other way around.”
I blink at him. “What?”
He tugs on my hand, urging me to sit on the edge of the bed while they all surround me. “Its rare, but there are instances of the genetic markers of an omega or alpha to manifest in children as young as eight. You started seeing Dr. Schwab around then, right?” I nod. “Typically, children who have those markers in their blood at such a young age end up being the strongest alphas or omegas. Maybe, he saw those genetic markers and thought you’d be the perfect candidate. Maybe they used your blood to create the formula that they gave Claudia. Maybe she’s the beta, and you’re the omega.”
I think about it. Its possible. I remember them taking a lot of blood from me for testing. But they also injected me with a lot of ‘medicine’.
“My mother…” I trail off, and Ethan snorts and shakes his head.
“Your mother doesn’t know what the fuck is going on. You told us she would take you there and drop you off. She didn’t stay with you. She hardly talked to Dr. Schwab. As long as she was receiving her money, she didn’t care.”
I wince at the harsh words, even if they’re true. No one likes to think of their mother doing what my mother did to me.
“Nice, Ethan,” Maddox growls at him. But then he sighs. “He’s not wrong, trouble. She only knows what they told her. And it’s pretty fucking obvious they weren’t the most honest people. For all we know, they could have lied about everything they did to you, to her.”
I shake my head. “I don’t look like an omega.” Swift lets out a sound of denial, but I continue forward. “I don’t. I’m too tall and not curvy like an omega. She looks like what you think of when someone says ‘omega’.” I fucking hate it too. If you looked up omega in the dictionary, there would be a picture of Claudia next to it.
Definitely not me.
Fuck.
“Well,” Swift says stubbornly. “You look like what I think of when I think of my omega. We’re yours, cherrybomb. Stop trying to give us to someone else.”
“I’m not trying-”
“Yeah, you kind of are, baby,” Ethan says, gently though. “You’ve been worried about this situation from the beginning. Resistant to it.”
I frown. “Excuse me for being weirded out by suddenly being a mated omega, Ethan.” His mouth quirks into half a smile. “I never thought I’d have a pack. I spent twenty-five years being a beta that no one-” I cut off what I was going to say.
But they already know. I spent twenty-five years being the beta that no one fought to keep. First because I was ‘sick’, and I didn’t want to date while dealing with monthly blood transfusions. Besides, no teenage boy wants to date a chronically ill girl who felt so shitty she couldn’t entertain the idea of sex or even a make out session.
When they declared I was healthy, I jumped from man to man, never lingering too long. That’s on me, but also, not one of the men I slept with wanted to keep me. Not one of them tried to get me to stay. It was usually a ‘thanks for the fuck, see you never situation.’
“We’re fighting for you, Cherrybomb,” Swift reassures me. “We’ll always fight for you.”
Maddox presses into my back. “Let us claim you, trouble. Let us show you that you’re ours.” He murmurs the request, just loud enough for the occupants of the room to hear, and even then I’m not sure Logan catches all of it.
I shake my head. “No.” When he opens his mouth to press the issue. I repeat. “No. No. I don’t want you to claim me right now. I don’t… I don’t want you to regret it later.”
All of them tense, bristling at the implication. They all start talking at once, reassuring me they wouldn’t. Even Luca, who’s already tied to me, is trying to convince me they won’t regret it. I want to believe them, but I’m haunted by the image of Maddox hugging Claudia, purring for her, by the hesitation painted on Logan’s face before he came to me. Ethan standing between the two of us, looking torn.
“I want you to get to know her. To see…” I take a shuddering breath and let it out slowly. “To see if you want her more than me. I need you to do this. If you don’t, I’ll always wonder if you made the right choice, if someday in the future you’re going to resent me for letting you bond with me.”
“If you bond with us, you’ll know we won’t regret it,” Swift says stubbornly. “We’ll be able to show you. You’ll feel it, Cherrybomb.”
On some level, I know he’s right, but on another level, the level that holds all of my insecurities and self loathing, I can’t believe it. My brain just won’t let me.
