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But we still hadn’t really gotten terribly deep in each other’s lives yet, and while Allison and Carmela had already talked with me about the subject a bit, Mallory and Melanie were still in the dark, I guessed.
“Sure,” I said. “I would love to have kids. I just want to be married for a little while first. Camden and I spent so long waiting for each other that I wanted to revel in that for a little bit first.”
“I get that,” Melanie said. “Victor and I waited a little while before we got pregnant.”
“A little while being a whole whopping three months,” Allison said. “Speaking of, how is little Vic Jr.?”
“He’s good, finally over that little cold,” she said. “He was so pitiful trying to get sleep with that cough.”
“I bet,” Allison said. “Leo told me that he and Owen were going to show him how to play baseball next week. I tried telling them that he was still a baby, but that didn’t seem to change their mind. It was only when I told them he had a cold that they decided to wait a bit.”
“Gosh, they are so cute together,” Melanie said. “I can’t wait for Vic Jr. to be playing with them. Then again, I enjoy the cuddly baby stuff too.”
“Don’t let anyone make you feel pressured,” Allison said, looking directly at me, returning to the conversation that I had hoped whisked itself away. “We all have had kids and we love it, and no doubt you will too. But I think all of us would have also liked a little time just with our husbands first.”
“Amen,” Carmela said. “I wouldn’t trade Cassie in for anything in the world, and I wouldn’t change a thing about her. But I do wish we’d had a little bit of time first. We stay so busy. If it weren’t for you girls, I’d probably never get a chance to be alone with him.”
“It really is amazing,” Melanie said. “The boys are so close, but somehow, they chose all of us, and I wouldn’t give up this group for anything.”
“Same,” Allison and Carmela chimed in.
“Absolutely,” Mallory said. “That includes you, sis.”
She was looking right at me, and I grinned.
“Seriously,” Allison said. “You are just as important as any one of us. We are so grateful Camden brought you into our lives. Please don’t take our baby talk as pressuring you or trying to make you feel any type of way.”
“I don’t,” I said.
The thing was I didn’t. I had been part of friend groups before where they would say similar things that these girls had, about sisterhood and being supportive. But behind all of it was a judgment that never went away, a competition to see who the best of us was. I never won those, usually on account of never having that special someone.
But with these girls, that jealousy, that judgment, it wasn’t there. This was true, honest, real friendship and I was so grateful for it. I felt like when they asked if I was going to have kids, it wasn’t to pressure me into it, it was genuine curiosity, and a bit of sneaky pre-planning, but only so they could presumably give me a baby shower and celebration like Mallory was having now.
“You know,” Mallory said, shifting in her chair, “this is my third kid. I am eternally grateful that anyone gave enough of a crap to give me a baby shower for her at all, but is all the pomp and circumstance really necessary? Those cupcakes are calling my name.”
The sound of a car pulling into the driveway made me and Carmela get up and look out of the window. The large windows had been installed just a couple days before by Ryan and a subcontractor he worked with, just in time to have the baby shower in the barn. It was a natural place to do it, considering it had a ton of space and everything we would need to be comfortable, all while being a stone’s throw away from the boys and the kids down at the baseball fields built just past the cornfields.
“Oh, Tamara is here,” Carmela said. “Looks like she brought balloons. A lot of balloons.”
Carmela wasn’t lying. As Tamara opened the door of the Uber minivan, a host of balloons preceded her. There must have been fifty of them, and I got up to go help her instinctively.
“I got it,” Melanie said. “If you would hold the door open for us, that would be great.”
I nodded and helped them get inside with the large collection of balloons, and as soon as they were in, the rest of the guests began filing in one by one. I stayed by the door and let everyone in, showing them around the rooms and making sure everyone knew where the restroom was and where we were holding the majority of the party.
A notification on my phone got me to open it up as things were getting underway. It was from Camden, a picture of Owen and Leo tossing the ball between them with Camden caught in a rundown in the center. It was so cute, and clearly taken by Graham or Victor or Mark. Ryan was in the background of the picture, laughing hysterically and pointing.
I wanted to show it to Mallory, but she was busy with the other guests coming in. Instead, I sent a heart emoji back.
How are things at the party? he asked.
Good. And there?
Great, aside from reminding myself that I was getting beat by toddlers.
You’re cute though, I sent back.
Are they giving you grief about when we are going to have kids? he asked, and I pursed my lips. How did I tell him how the conversation went without him assuming that I was shining it up really well?
