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She needs space.
I close my eyes, knowing what I have to do. With a quick peck to her lips, I then roll off her and sit up. Running my fingers through my gelled hair, I attempt to squash the hurt lancing at my heart.
She sits up and slides her palm over my back, resting her head on my shoulder. “Thank you.”
Twisting, I meet her face for one more chaste kiss and then rise to my feet. As long as we’re touching, it’s too difficult to do what’s right. I vowed that I’d do anything for her and I meant it. If it means keeping her from doing something she’ll regret tomorrow, then I’ll do it.
That’s what real love is.
Sacrificing what you want for the one who owns your soul.
“Promise me one thing,” I say when I reach the window.
“Anything.”
My heart twists. “Don’t shut me out after this. At the very least, just seeing you and talking to you is what I need. It’ll have to be enough.”
Silence fills the room and I start to panic. She finally agrees with a small sound of affirmation.
She won’t shut me out.
She can’t or I won’t survive it.
I take one last look at the woman who has me tied in a million knots. She’s teary-eyed, completely wrecked, and so fucking sad. I’ve never seen a more beautiful sight in all my life.
“I’ll wait for you. Until you’re ready.”
A small smile tugs at her lips. “You may wait a long time.”
“For you, babe, I’d wait forever.”
With those words, I slip out through her window and into the night. The window closes behind me and the locks engage. Slowly, I amble my way across the yard to where Gemma’s face glows from her phone. I’m not exactly ready to face my sister or her barrage of questions, but there’s nowhere else to go.
I climb into the Tahoe and buckle in, my entire body feeling shattered and ready to crumble.
“It didn’t go well,” Gemma whispers. “Oh, Dempsey. I’m sorry.”
Her hand brushes over my arm. The comforting touch of my twin has me relaxing, allowing all the pain to settle deep inside my bones. I press my fingers to my eyes and slump my shoulders. The fingertips grow wet as my body trembles.
Gemma scratches her long nails over the back of my tuxedo jacket, murmuring soft words. It reminds me of when we were toddlers and I’d have a nightmare. We didn’t need our parents. We just needed each other. I was never scared or upset as long as I had Gemma by my side.
When I’ve let out enough emotion for one night, I sit up straight, stare out the windshield, and make the drive back home.
This isn’t goodbye.
It’s just a pause.
Only a horrible, painful fucking pause.
I will get through this.
The prize waiting for me on the other side is worth it.
Sloane
Jamie: How are you feeling today? Anything I can do?
I stare at my phone in disbelief. Last night, after the art event at PMU, Jamie apologized profusely on behalf of her son while I tried desperately not to cry.
