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“It sounds like a good opportunity for you to learn about your roots while you’re here then,” Rolando suggests, and for the first time, I hear a light accent coming through his words. I’m not sure where he’s from, but there’s a distinct way he says certain words. I’m not going to pry, but maybe I’ll find out soon enough.
“Yes, exactly. It’s crazy because I’m nervous to be here, but I’m excited too. There are so many possibilities.” I might sound a little bit crazy, but I am excited to learn more about my birth family. “Do you know anything about them?”
Rolando looks in the rear-view mirror and raises a brow. “I know a lot about them. What is it you’d like to know?” Rolando begins moving in the line of traffic and proceeds down another road.
There are plenty of questions that run through my mind. “Are they good people? Are they family-oriented? How many of them are there?” Every time a decent question comes to my mind, I ask it. I don’t want to pry too much, but I want to know more about them, too. I don’t even know how I should be acting right now.
“There are a few of them. Ruslan is the oldest, and then there’s Lom, Nazyr, and Eset. All in that order. I’m taking you to Ruslan’s house now to meet him, where you’ll likely meet his wife, Amelia, and their little boy, Karim.”
“I can’t wait. This has been such a long time coming.”
“I’m sure it has. We’re going to be there very shortly,” Rolando tells me as he shifts lanes.
I look out at the beautiful city of Grozny. This could have been my home. It blows my mind. On the right, there’s The Heart of Chechnya. I’ve seen it online, but I never thought I’d have the opportunity to see it in person, even if I’m simply driving by. It’s the oldest mosque in the city, which has Ottoman-style architecture, and it’s also one of the largest.
Rolando keeps driving, and at the next intersection, he makes a right, and then he pulls into a parking garage attached to a massive condominium complex. He goes up a few floors and then parks. Rolando gets out first and opens the door for me, extending a hand in the process. I gladly take it and exit the SUV.
“We will come get your bags later, depending on what you decide.”
“What I decide?” I repeat, uncertain what he means.
“I believe Ruslan and Amelia are going to let you stay with them if you want. If not, there are plenty of local hotels where we can make some accommodations for you.”
“Oh, okay, I see,” I say and force a light smile.
Rolando leads us toward the elevators and presses the button to go up. He pulls some sort of key from his pocket, and when he selects the floor we need to go on, he inserts the key and turns it to the right. The button he pressed lights up green, and the elevator takes us to that floor.
Now I’m getting really nervous. Up until this moment, it didn’t feel as real as it does right now. I’m about to meet more of my blood, more people who can help me connect with myself on a deeper level.
Suddenly, the elevator doors open, and we walk into Ruslan’s place. “Mr. Umarova, I’ve arrived,” Rolando declares as he steps inside the home.
“Hey there. Ruslan’s in the office with Lom.” A woman with brown hair and hazel eyes comes toward us from the kitchen area. A small boy stands next to her, tugging on the leg of her jeans. “I’m Amelia, by the way. It’s really nice to meet you, Xava. Everyone here is really excited to get to know you.”
Amelia’s words help to settle my nerves a little bit. “It’s great to be here. Thank you for inviting me.”
“You’re very welcome,” Amelia replies, then looks at Rolando. “Go ahead and take her into the office. I know Ruslan and Lom are anxiously awaiting her arrival.”
“Of course, Mrs. Umarova,” Rolando responds as he begins walking further into the house. In less than a minute, Rolando is rapping his knuckles against the back of the door.
“Come in,” a man’s deep voice greets us.
I lick my lips nervously as Rolando opens the door for me. I walk inside the office, and Rolando stands at the door for just a moment. “I’ll wait for Xava in the living room, sir.”
“Don’t you mean Ms. Beno?” the man who sits behind the desk asks Rolando. I think that must be Ruslan, but I can’t be too certain since we haven’t made introductions yet.
“No, sir. She specifically requested I call her Xava,” Rolando answers.
The man looks at me, and I speak up, supporting what Rolando has said. “I felt like it’s entirely too formal. Xava is easier.”
The man motions with his head for Rolando to leave, and Rolando shuts the door. I take a seat in the other armchair sitting across from the desk.
“Xava, I’m Ruslan, and this is one of my other brothers, Lom.” The man behind the desk is the patriarch of the family, now I see.
“It’s great to meet you both. Thank you so much for flying me out here. I’m really excited to be in Grozny.” I plaster on a smile, trying to break the ice. I don’t know if they can tell I’m nervous, but I am.
“We’re very glad to have you out here. It’s been a long time coming.” As Ruslan speaks, my stomach drops. It’s almost like he knows something I don’t. I mean, he hasn’t given me any real indications that this is the case, but over the years, I’ve learned to trust my gut, and my gut is telling me something else is going on here.
Could Ruslan and Lom be more to me than just a relative?
