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Isabella
I hold the dress up to the full-length mirror and twist to and fro. “This is one of the nicest things I’ve ever owned. You know you don’t have to keep buying me things.”
Sam presses her elbow onto the bed and twists to face me. “I know, but I want to. Retail therapy works on all fronts, you know.”
I sigh and turn around to face her. “I wish it was that simple.”
Sam frowns and sits up. “Are you still having those nightmares?”
I drape the dress on the back of the dresser chair and sink into it. “I don’t know what to do, Sam. Every night, it’s the same dream.”
And each night, I woke up panicked and drenched in sweat, thinking Carter is going to take my baby from me. Logically, I know Carter isn’t that cruel, and he doesn’t have the moral high ground to take that stance with me, but a part of me does wonder.
If I’m not his precious dove anymore, then who am I?
Sam walks over to me and takes both of my hands in hers. “It’s a nightmare. A shitty one, but it’s not going to happen. Carter is not going to take your baby away from you, not because of Rich or anything else.”
I glance over her shoulder at the closed door and then back at her face. “You don’t know that.”
“Actually, I do,” Sam replies with the barest hint of a smile. “I’ve seen him over the past few weeks, and I can’t believe I’m about to say this, but he’s really trying, Isabella.”
I blink. “What do you mean?”
“Tristan says he’s trying to do better and reign his temper in a lot more,” Sam admits, with a quick and guilty look over her shoulder. “I’m not sure if I should be telling you this, but I think it’ll help you to know that you aren’t the only one who’s trying.”
Knowing he’s making an effort doesn’t make me feel better. If anything, it makes me feel worse. Carter is becoming the man I’ve always known he can be. And I’ve turned into the woman we both feared I would be.
Fate really has a sick and twisted sense of humor.
“I know he’s trying,” I whisper before I withdraw my hands. “He’s been so patient and gentle, and I know it’s because he wants to show me that it’s okay, but…”
“But?”
“How can I be a good mother if I’m carrying around all this… shit? How can I bring a child into this world when nothing has changed? Even if Carter is trying, he can’t control the violence and chaos around him.”
No matter how much he wants to.
“For what it’s worth, I think he’s doing the best he can,” Sam replies after a brief pause. “I don’t know what you should do, but I’ll be here no matter what you decide.”
When she leaves, I strip out of my clothes and hurry into the shower. I’m washing the shampoo out of my hair when the door creaks open. I spin around and spot Carter through my curtain of hair. Wordlessly, he steps out of his own clothes and slides the door open. Blood and dirt trickle down his skin and swirl into puddles at our feet.
Sam’s words are still echoing in my head when I bridge the distance between us and kiss him.
Carter makes a low noise in the back of his throat and pushes us back, so my back hits the wall. His arms come up around me, caging me in his embrace. My head is spinning, and some of the tightness in my chest abates as we kiss.
I kiss Carter like I’ve been starving for air. Like I need him to keep from dissolving into a million pieces.
When I tilt my head to the side, he bites down on my lower lip, and I gasp. Carter’s tongue darts in, sending another wave of desire crashing over me. I dig my nails into his shoulders, and my knees go weak. Carter makes another noise in the back of his throat and wrenches his lips away. He presses hot, open-mouthed kisses down the side of my neck and over my jaw.
One hand darts between us and flicks my nipples.
“Carter, I—”
He presses a finger to my lips. “No talking, dove.”
I press my lips together and exhale.
