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I nod. “Yeah, I know.”
Anita’s expression turns wistful, a far-off gleam in her eyes as she looks away from me and at the window. “I honestly couldn’t have gotten through it without Nico and Daniel.”
I pause to adjust the pillow behind me and curl onto my side so I’m facing her directly. “Nico is Carter’s dad, right? He doesn’t talk much about him.”
Carter barely brings up his parents, except in the most glowing of terms and even then, on rare occasions. And while a part of me appreciates that he had a pair of wonderful, loving, and supportive parents, the other part of me wants to know more.
I’m sure there was more to them than elaborate date nights or mornings spent playing with the kids. And the more I learn about the Blackthorne family, the more curious I am. Hearing about all the good stuff isn’t enough, not anymore.
Because I need to know it wasn’t just a show.
I have to know that their love was able to survive, even when things got dark. Otherwise, what hope do Carter and I have?
“Losing them was hard for Carter,” Anita reveals, her gaze shifting back to mine. Her expression is clearer now and a lot sadder, as whatever memory had her in its throes loses its grip on her. “There were days when I wondered if he was going to survive. Some losses break people so completely that it’s hard to come back from that.”
I swallow and lapse into silence.
“I think what was worse was feeling like their death was completely out of his hands. Like he couldn’t have done anything differently,” Anita adds in a strange voice. “Of all the things that could’ve killed them, a car accident just seems so…”
“Ordinary?”
Anita nods and offers me a grateful smile. “They led big, ambitious lives, and they were definitely taken too soon. Brooke was in the car with them the night they died.”
My eyes widen as I gape at her. “She was?”
I don’t understand why Carter never told me or why he felt the need to keep this from me in the first place. But I know that the topic of Brooke is always going to be a sore one, especially for him.
It isn’t lost on me that I wouldn’t be here today if I didn’t resemble her. And I haven’t forgotten the fact that Carter carried a torch for her for years. Sometimes, I wonder if a part of him will always love her for what they could’ve had because time isn’t going to change or distort his image of her.
In his mind, Brooke is always going to be this perfect specimen of the first woman he loved. And I’m never going to be able to live up to that, especially now that he’s gotten to know me.
Brooke Blackthorne will live on in the hearts and minds of those who loved her as a young, vivacious, and gorgeous woman who had her life ahead of her.
I can’t possibly compete with that, and I know I shouldn’t.
Anita runs a hand over her face. “I think Carter was out with a friend that night, and the three of them were on their way back from some kind of event. Brooke didn’t mind going as much as Carter did, but then that driver came out of nowhere…”
I reach for Anita’s hand and squeeze. “You don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to.”
Some of the shadows on Anita’s face disappear. “Talking about it helps. I think it’s one of the only ways to make sure the past no longer has any kind of hold on you.”
I give Anita’s hand another squeeze. “I understand.”
Because I myself feel like I’m never going to stop being that young woman who worked for Lacey, who went to work terrified every day, just to be able to keep my father and me afloat.
“Carter spent weeks in the hospital by Brooke’s side, and I think that up until that moment, Brooke was able to convince herself that what Carter felt for her wasn’t real. She thought it was just gratitude because their parents saved Carter from a terrible fate.”
“Do you think that was the case?”
Anita twists onto her side and looks at me. “Carter loved Brooke in the only way he knew how, but after their parents died, he became obsessive. And he became controlling, and I don’t think Brooke liked that. They fought so much that we all began to wonder if they were going to end up destroying each other.”
“I had no idea it was that difficult.”
“It wasn’t always, but it could be sometimes. I tried to warn Carter and advise him, but at the time, he was surrounding himself with people who wanted to use him. People who saw the advantages of cozying up to the new head of the Blackthorne family.”
I want to hurt the people who steered him wrong and who made him feel like his worth was tied to what he brought to the table.
“What about Carter’s grandfather? Why wasn’t he still in charge?”
