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Hugo’s tone was soft, gentle. “That’s great. Have you told him?”
My voice was very small. “No.”
“Why not?”
My chest tightened again. The reasons felt insurmountable and nausea washed over me as I spoke. “We signed a contract. Our business relationship has an end point. Once we hit that date, we agreed we’d both walk our separate ways and never look back.”
“I think… I think you need to tell him.”
A lump formed in my throat and I swallowed hard. “Do I have to?”
“No. But I think you’ll regret it if you don’t.”
“But… what does it mean for me? Like, my sexuality? I don’t think I can say I’m straight anymore.”
“That’s okay. You don’t have to put a label on it yet. Maybe you’re heteroflexible. Maybe you’re bi or pan. Maybe you’re gay. It doesn’t matter, at least not right this minute. You have the rest of your life to decide which label fits, if any. What matters is, you like the guy you’re married to and you need to tell him before you lose him.”
I thought of the way my heart raced when I was near him, the way Levi was ever-present in my mind, no matter what I was doing, and how he was the first person I thought of when I had something exciting to share or a concern I needed to hash out. “I think it’s more than that. I think I’m in love with him.”
“Then you know what to do.”
I let out a shaky breath. “I guess I do,” I murmured. “Thanks for the advice.”
“Oh, and Soren?”
“Yeah?”
He was quiet for a moment. “Don’t keep lying to Mom and Dad. You’ll feel better when they know the truth.”
The weight of his words settled on my shoulders. He was right. “Thanks,” I murmured. “I mean it.” We hung up and I put the phone down before drumming my fingertips on the top of the desk for a few moments. I was going to tell Levi about my epiphany, certainly, but not until he got home from work. There was no reason to disrupt his workday. Instead, I picked up my phone again and dialed my parents before setting it to a video call. I wanted them to be able to see my face, see how sincere I was, while we talked.
Mom’s face filled the screen after a moment of ringing, her smile bright, her eyes lit with happiness. “Hi, honey!”
“Hey, Mom. Is Dad there? I was hoping to talk to both of you.”
“Of course he is,” she said, looking around. “Let me just go get him.” Her image bobbed and dipped as she walked around the house, calling for Dad. It didn’t take her long to locate him. He was burrowed on the couch, watching a baseball playoff game. Mom snuggled up next to him and held the phone in front of them both. “Okay, honey, what was it you wanted to talk about? Anything important?”
My stomach dipped and roiled. I nearly scoffed at her words, but I held in the impulse. Important? Just my sexual awakening, I thought, forcing a smile. “It’s about Levi.”
“Oh no, don’t tell me you two are calling it quits so soon,” Mom said.
“No, I—”
“You’re getting divorced already?” Dad asked, leaning in to look at me. “I thought we liked him.”
“Dad—”
“You two made such a lovely couple, too,” Mom said, clucking her tongue.
I raised my voice to be heard. “Stop. We’re not getting divorced. At least, not yet.”
Mom exhaled and her shoulders relaxed. “That’s a relief. Wait, what do you mean, not yet?”
I unraveled the whole story for them, the same way I’d explained it to Hugo. I told them about the way we’d met, the business arrangement, and the plans to divorce the following summer. I mentioned the prenup and the divorce agreement. Then I told them about how the more time we’d spent together, the more I liked him, the more I wanted to be around him when we weren’t just working. I told them how he made me feel and how I smiled whenever I was around him. I told them almost everything. I did not tell them about the sex, for obvious reasons.
When I was done talking, they were quiet for a few moments. Finally, Mom spoke, taking a deep breath. “Honey, can I tell you something?”
“Sure, Mom. Anything.”
