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Henri marched out.
His muscular bare chest now covered in a black t-shirt, his hand rubbing his crotch with a fluffy white towel. He slammed to a stop as he looked up. The large wet patch on his trousers hinted he’d tried to wash away my desire.
Prickles darted down my back.
Shame followed quickly.
Did he find me that unattractive?
He’d said he would enjoy hurting me. He’d confessed that the darkness within him would like demeaning and punishing me, yet he hadn’t said anything about actually liking me.
Apparently, making me come truly was just a kindness, just like feeding me had been. He’d ordered room service and let me stuff my face for one reason only—to give me strength to keep pretending by his side.
The urge to apologise clung to the tip of my tongue.
I’d eaten all the food and used him to come.
I wanted to promise he would never have to do something like that again because this was almost over. I hated that he felt used. That he’d done things today that he would never ordinarily do, all in order to help others.
He might use me as a confessional booth and whispered heinous truths, but I was desperate to learn more.
How long had he been a cop?
Who did he love?
Where would he go after this?
But those questions could never be asked because cameras were watching, and courage was lacking, and I didn’t have the strength to guard my heart against feelings it definitely shouldn’t be feeling.
Sucking in a breath, I raised my chin and prepared to go to battle with him. “I’m coming with you.”
He scowled, his short hair slicked back and grey eyes tight. Tossing the towel onto the grotesque throne in the corner, he shook his head. “You’re staying here.”
Marching to the door, he fisted the handle and wrenched it open. “Lock this after me. Go back to sleep.”
I dashed to his side, grabbed his shoulder, and stood on tiptoes to breathe in his ear. “Let me help you. His office is probably guarded. And if it isn’t, there’ll be cameras just like everywhere else in this hellhole. I-I could be look out or act as a distraction if we get caught.”
He froze.
His fingers curled around the doorknob, his muscles rigid beneath my fingers. “Stop touching me, Ily. I’m aware there could be guards and I’m highly aware of the fucking cameras. But I have to try. And I’ll try alone. Do what I say and go back to bed.”
I did none of those things.
My voice shook with quiet urgency. “How will you explain why you’re roaming the citadel at three in the morning…alone? Wouldn’t it make more sense if I was with you?”
Slowly, he turned to confront me. His handsome face strained with sleepless nights and worry. “I won’t need to explain anything because I won’t be seen.”
“But the cameras—”
“Yes, they’ll record me but the guards might be lazy. By the time anyone thinks to question why I was roaming around in the dark, hopefully our ride will be here and this will be over. It won’t matter if I’m seen because we’ll be gone.”
Fear percolated in my chest. “It’s too risky. Take me with you. Together…remember?”
His eyes snapped closed.
He swallowed a groan.
The tension in his muscles turned to stone.
