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I’d missed this. Her easy expressions of joy. After she lost the baby, I worried she’d fall into a deep depression and not come out of it. At least now, I could see that she was okay.
It may have taken some time, but she’d pulled herself out of it and moved on. I was able to breathe easier knowing that she had. It hurt when I couldn’t be there for her. That she shut me out. If we were going to attempt another relationship, that couldn’t happen again.
I shrugged on my coat and carried the boxes of lights to the porch. I hung them from the porch roof, thinking that Holly could handle the railing.
A few minutes later, Holly came outside with another box.
“I thought I grabbed everything.” I gestured at the box in her arms.
Holly set the box on the ground and pulled out a green bundle. “It’s garland. I thought I could wrap it around the railing with the lights.”
I gave her a pointed look. “You know no one comes out here.”
Holly smiled, her eyes crinkling at the corners. “You’ll see it, and maybe it will lift your spirits.”
“You think my spirits need lifting?” I asked her to cover the softening of my heart. Other than my family, no one had worried about me. I knew my brothers’ significant others did, but it wasn’t the same as when it came from Holly.
Holly nodded, her smile spreading wider. “We could all use it.”
The warmth from that smile spread through my chest as I continued to staple the lights to the overhang.
“Maybe you should keep the lights on all year. Like the ones on the paths.”
“That would make it less work for me.”
“You can’t escape the fact that you live on a Christmas tree farm. You should embrace it.”
I braced my hands on the roof and leaned in a bit so I could see her face on the porch. “You’re saying we should celebrate Christmas all year long?”
Holly stilled, and when she looked up at me, her expression was filled with excitement. “You could have events when we let people on the farm to hike through the tree fields and see the holiday lights. Kind of like Christmas in July, but it’s more of a Christmas anytime kind of thing. Visit Monroe Christmas Tree Farm and get your holiday fix.”
I shook my head, my lips curving into a smile. “You’ve been hanging out with Marley too much.”
Holly rolled her eyes. “She’d love the idea.”
I shook my head. “And Emmett’s going to hate it.”
“He hates everything,” Holly said in a distracted way, as if her mind was racing with the possibilities. She pulled out her phone and began typing.
I paused, my hand holding the string of lights against the roof. “You’re not telling her now, are you?”
Holly’s lips curled. “It’s too good of an idea to sit on.”
I growled.
Her mouth dropped open as she lifted her gaze from the screen. “Are you growling at me?”
I shook my head. “Not at you. Your idea. We like when the season ends and the farm is ours again.”
Holly pursed her lips as if she was thinking it through in her head. “This wouldn’t be all the time, like the holiday season. It would be a few structured dates throughout the year. You could leave the farm on those days if you wanted.”
I tipped my head to the side. “You know I have to work the farm.”
Holly gave me a look. “We both know you do the least of your brothers around here.”
I secured the next string of lights. “It’s not because I don’t want to help the family.”
“You’re busy with work.”
