AllFreeNovel
Share Us
“Here.” I hand her the glass of whiskey. “Drink this. It will numb the pain.” She takes the glass and watches me as I take a mouthful from mine.
“Is that why you drink so much?”
I don’t deny it, but I don’t answer her either.
“If you could have had any other life, as in you weren’t born into the mafia, what would you have done with your life?”
“I’m not answering that.”
“Why?” she asks, taking another sip of her whiskey. It occurs to me that we are actually having a conversation. She is not yelling at me or making sarcastic remarks. Without judgment, she is asking me a question with genuine curiosity.
“Because it’s a ridiculous question. I am Luca Valsetti, and I was born into the mob.”
“Oh, come on, humor me,” she says with a seductive smile. The whisky is clearly affecting her.
“Red, you’re really getting on my nerves with all your questions.”
“Come on, don’t you ever think that things would be different if you weren’t who you were? Haven’t you ever wondered what your life would look like if you weren’t born a Valsetti?”
I ponder on her question because it is something I thought about a lot when I was a teenager. I knew I was to become the family enforcer. But back then, I was just a kid, with hopes and dreams just like any other. But as I grew older, I knew that those same hopes and dreams would just cause me pain. Even then, as a small kid growing up, I knew I wasn’t like the other normal children. We would all get asked by our teachers, ‘What do you want to be when you grow up?’ Some kids said policeman, a fireman, others answered with I want to be a nurse or lawyer. I was taught by my father to always be honest with other people and myself, so I answered the best way I knew how at the time. I said, ‘When I grow up, I want to be just like my father.’ Everyone thought that was cute except those who actually knew the monster my father was. Growing up, I was trained to be the family enforcer. No weekend soccer games or play dates for me.
“A butcher, I wanted to be a butcher.” I play with her, cocking a brow.
“Very funny.” She chuckles. I notice her tension has eased some. She seems relaxed and comfortable, which is the first time I have seen her like this. Her hazel eyes sparkle with promise and beauty. I actually don’t mind this side of her, apart from all the questions.
“You must have something you dream of having. What about a family? Do you want kids?”
“I am not the white picket fence, house full of kids, kind of man, red.” It is almost comical to think about me bringing children into this world, considering the man I am. What sort of life would I give them? I am not exactly a good role model, am I? Besides, I wouldn’t want to bring a child into a life where fighting and death is like second nature to them. That would not be fair, nor would I want that life for them. If I had a son, he would be a soldier in the syndicate, he’d live a life of brutal brotherhood, just as I have. A daughter would be subjected to bodyguards and strict social rules, to then be married off to another man like a business transaction in the name of the family legacy. It’s a cruel world of wealth and power that only the strongest of women survive in. They should stay a distant dream rather than any form of reality.
“Hello! Earth to Luca.” Scarlet waves her hand in front of my face.
I turn my head in her direction, realizing I had just drifted away in my mind. She looks at me expectantly.
“What?”
She sighs. “I just asked you like a million questions, and you dodged every one of them.”
I don’t have the answers she seeks, well, not the ones she wants to hear anyway. “I’m not sure if you’re ready to hear my real answers.”
She looks at me blankly for a moment, then nods with a glint of sympathy. “Yeah, you are probably right. There are some things about you that I will probably never understand.”
Scarlet is dead right. She will never understand why I don’t let myself dream. I am a cold-blooded killer, and there are no sweet dreams for me because there are only nightmares in my world.
Twenty-One
Scarlet
We shared a moment, albeit small, but it was a moment, nonetheless. A time where we were merely a man and woman, not captor and victim. There is this whole human side of him that I never knew existed. I can now see that underneath his hard exterior, he is a broken man, just as vulnerable as any. He let his walls down just far enough so I could see the devastation, loneliness and sadness that lives behind them.
Luca wants me to believe that he has no dreams, but everybody dreams. Everybody wants something more, something different. It’s human nature.
Confusion muddles my thoughts. I know there is something that has changed in us. I saw it the second he brushed the hair from my tear-soaked face and the minute he soothed my wrists with the burn cream. He looked at me with pity but at the same time with respect.
I’m not even sure why I asked the questions I did. Why do I even care? I’m going to die soon at the hands of him. So why did I feel the need to know that my murderer has a soul?
It doesn’t make anything easier with this change in him. Actually, it only makes it harder. Deep down, I’m not certain that he wants to kill me. I know he believes he has no choice but to follow the orders of his brother. It’s clear he feels he has no options when it comes to the rules of his syndicate. But I see the hint of doubt that surfaces whenever he’s around me. I feel it. And now, it’s like he’s punishing himself for letting me in just that little bit because I haven’t seen him in two days. Joe, Hammer, and some other creepy-looking guy have delivered my meals three times a day. Each time they come in to use the bathroom or eat themselves, they don’t speak to me. Not that I want them to, but it reminds me of the fact that I am the enemy. They treat me like the prisoner I am locked in my glass cage.
Boredom is a constant, living breathing pain in my ass. Sure, there is cable TV, but my mind is so clouded I find myself staring at the screen blankly, not really paying attention. There are no books to read, only the bustling streets of Manhattan below as mild entertainment.
