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He pulls back to study me. The look in his eye is one of surprise when I don’t yell at him for kissing me. I offer a small, abashed smile to let him know I’m not about to throw something at him. A smile to let him know that it’s okay. I am okay.
The air sizzles around us with a silent tension as we stare at one another for what feels like an eternity before he leans back in to kiss me again. This time, his kiss is harder, needier, less sweet, and a lot hungrier. He tastes like whiskey and the sweetest sin as his tongue finds mine. A sexy groan from his throat has me nearly collapsing at the sound. I’ve never been kissed so lovingly, yet so longingly. I don’t ever think I have been kissed properly until this moment. Sure, when I was younger, I dated a few guys here and there, but they all ended as quickly as they began. I had too many responsibilities. I couldn’t go out to parties and certainly couldn’t hang out after school. That tends to put a damper on any development past the first kiss.
My longest relationship lasted a whole month, and that was only because he was hanging around to get in my pants. Then once he got that, he was gone. That was the first and last time I ever had sex. It wasn’t even a memorable moment. The earth didn’t move, and my world didn’t change. It was just an unenjoyable, painful two minutes that I regretted for a long time after.
I keep waiting for the moment he pushes himself away, disgraced with himself. Yet with every passing second, he kisses me more eagerly. My hands find the courage to touch him, coming to his chest as if they had a mind of their own. I can feel the hard muscle of his chest under my palms, and suddenly I feel hot, so fucking hot in this robe like my insides are on fire.
He returns my touch with his own, splaying his hand across the exposed nape of my neck. he warmth of his skin on mine has me releasing a low moan. His taste is so sweet, even though I know its bitter poison cloaked in his undeniable ability to weaken my knees. I wish I could say I don’t want this; I wish I could say stop and acknowledge the million red flags waving at me right now. But I don’t want to. I’m so sick of doing what is right all the time, so tired of feeling like I am failing, so utterly exhausted of being the good responsible Indie. I just want to feel good. I want to feel free of it all, even if it isn’t real. Even when tomorrow comes and I know I’ll feel regret. Now is all that matters to me. Now and him.
Chapter Thirty-Two
Roman
MY TONGUE ENTWINES with hers so perfectly. It’s like they were always meant to meet. The suppleness of her skin under the palm of my hand, the sweetness of her lips, and the small moan that escapes her as my hands touch her bare shoulders underneath her robe have my cock throbbing angrily in my pants, begging me to set it free.
All these months of holding back have me like a hungry beast that has escaped from his cage. I want to devour every fucking inch of her. I want to feel her inside and out, taste her head to toe. I know I should be careful and take this slow, but there is no withholding this carnal need. I have to fuck her, right here, right now.
Kissing a trail down her neck, I make work of untying the cord of her robe. I expect resistance from her, but I don’t get it. This beautiful, sad creature is giving herself to me without reservation. If I was a better man, I would stop. But I am not. I want her, and goddammit, if she’s going to let me, I’m taking it without judgment.
I slowly drop the rob tie, pulling back from our kiss to look at her. She’s beautiful, so fucking beautiful. Her skin glows in the moonlight reflecting off the window. I expected her to be shy and cover herself from my prowling eyes, but the burning flames in her eyes show confidence and absolution. She wants this as much as me.
Tracing the small swell of her breast, I lick my lips, moving to her peaked nipple. Every curve of her body, every inch of her porcelain skin, is utter perfection. She’s so much more than I anticipated.
The obvious rise and fall of her chest with her exaggerated breaths shows me it is taking every bit of bravery she has to stand bare in front of me. My hands travel the length of her petite waist, over her hips, and around her ass as I squeeze her cheeks.
“You are exquisite,” I complement, pulling her towards me, claiming her mouth, tasting her sweetness. Taking everything she has to give, and boy, does she fucking give it. Her tongue tangles with mine unapologetically as she tears at my t-shirt, tugging at it, frantically eager to make me as bare as she.
With my shirt successfully removed, her eyes wander over my chest, her fingers tracing the lines of my tattoos. I watch her bite her bottom lip, sucking it into her mouth before she slowly looks up at me with such wonder, such a lightness, that it sucks all the air from my lungs. I wish she could see the way she’s looking at me right now. If I could capture it, like she does in her photographs, I’d plaster my walls, floor to ceiling, in this captivating, beautiful woman.
I back her against the glass, kissing her lips, her neck, the swell of her breasts, and trail my tongue over her peaked nipple down to her stomach, pausing at the mound of her pussy, the small ruffle of hair tickling my chin. I part her legs, hooking one over my shoulder, opening her up to me. Inhaling deeply, I smell her want for me, such a delicious scent. She arches her back, sucking in air as I run my tongue over her clit and along her entrance, taking my time to not miss a single bit of her. Working my tongue simultaneously with my fingers, I plunge them inside her, lapping up every piece of her wetness like a rabid beast. Just as I think the small moans of pleasure that come from her will near end me, she threads her fingers into my hair and claws at my scalp. I growl possessively. I want to scream, Mine. I want to fuck her against this window. Mine! I want to see my cum dripping down the glass and smear my goddamn name in it. Mine!
Her legs begin to stiffen, her breath fastening as the sweetest fucking sound erupts from her lips. She climaxes hard, her free leg buckles, the one over my shoulder trembling uncontrollably. I stand and lift her into my arms, she wraps her legs around my waist and hooks her arms around my neck. God, she’s a vision, cheeks flushed and eyes sparkling from her release.
Then as though the very universe shifts from under me, she kisses me. Indie kisses me completely of her own accord, with no coaxing from me. She’s the one who initiates the kiss. It’s full of so much purpose that my heart explodes in my chest. My darkened soul sparks. It fucking ignites in a roaring flame, life flooding back through it.
Laying her gently on my bed, I slide off my pants, eager to be inside of her. She watches me, her eyes hooded as I climb on top of her. We look at each other for a long moment as I line my cock up at her entrance. One push, and I will be inside her. One push, and we will never be able come back from this. I look for the smallest hint of hesitation in her eyes, but I only see lust and longing, maybe a slight bit of fear, but I’d never hurt her. I’d never take from her what she was not one hundred percent willing to give.
“It’s not too late,” I say, giving her an out now, being the better man I know I need to be for her.
“It was too late the moment you kissed me.” She reaches her hands around me to my backside and pulls me towards her. Inside her. She cries out as I fill her, the sweet sound of her, along with her wetness, has me groaning. No, I’m fucking moaning. That voice inside me is screaming louder and louder. Mine!
I wait a moment to move, allowing her to stretch around me, kissing her all the while I pull out to my tip and then slowly back in again. The sensation is like nothing I’ve ever felt before. Thunder roars in my head. Blood rushes through my veins with such intensity that it sends every nerve ending soaring into such a need I can’t control myself as I drive in and out of her like I’m taking a piece of her with every thrust. Her hips undulate, and her back arches off the bed as she meets every thrust. Moans escape her. The fucking moans are the softest, sweetest sounds, like my very own symphony. The warmth of her, the tightness, the absolute essence of her is driving me over the edge. I can’t get enough of her, can’t get deep enough, can’t get close enough. It’s too much, yet not enough. I want more.
Her whole body stiffens under me, her breaths fast and heavy as she digs her fingernails into my back, crying out her release. I don’t stop. I can’t stop as I feel her pussy clench around my cock. It undoes me. I can’t control my own release as I cum hard, growling into her neck.
The smell of sex and sweat fills my room, I slide out of her slowly. She blinks up at me, her eyes sparkling and sated. I kiss her forehead, her eyelids, and then her lips. She smiles from underneath our kiss, and it fucking melts my hardened heart. I adore her like this. So unguarded and happy. It fills me with so much warmth, knowing that she can be like this with me. Someone she’s pushed away for so long, someone she fought with every fibre of her being. I feel undeserving of the woman she just gave me. The pieces of herself she shared with me are precious and rare, and I’m so fucking grateful.
I kiss her neck and then along her collarbone, the soft skin like silk on my tongue.
“You are so fucking beautiful. I can’t stop,” I admit. She gasps, arching her back as I take her nipple into my mouth, gently biting down hard enough to cause pain, but soft enough that the after sting brings pleasure.
“You drive me crazy.”
“You drive me crazy too.” She giggles. “But I don’t think in the same way.”
I chuckle also, her nipple still in my mouth. Tiny little goosebumps form on her skin from the sensation.
“Oh.” I lift my head, cocking it to her. I reach between her legs, finding the tight swollen nub between them, and circle my thumb over it. Her mouth immediately opens, her body tensing. “I beg to differ.”
