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I shake my head from side to side, feeling disgusted in myself, but no, I don’t feel bad for them anymore. They deserve everything they get for doing this to my brother, and with that realisation, a part of me dies inside. I want them to pay. I want them to suffer and to be dealt with so that they can never harm anyone again. Guilt should stain me, but it doesn’t, because the anger and the pain of it is too raw and confronting to feel anything else.
Chapter Thirty-Five
Roman
EXHAUSTION FINALLY OVERTAKES Indie’s will to stay awake. She’s finally asleep, her head resting on the side of Austin's bed, her hand still in his. She has not left his side in two days except to go to the bathroom. I creep into the room and place the bag of clothes I bought her on the floor next to her chair.
Austin still hasn’t woken up. His condition has stabilized, but he’s not out of the woods. We don’t know if there is permanent brain damage. We don’t know if he will even regain consciousness. I think that’s the worst part for Indie. The not knowing.
A nurse enters the room. She smiles curtly at me then goes about pressing buttons on a machine and taking notes. I want to tell her to fuck off; she’ll wake up Indie, but realize she’s just doing her job, and that would be uncalled for.
Eyes brighter than a blue sky, blink open and focus on me. Dammit. As much as my heart warms to see them, right now I’d rather her get the sleep she so desperately needs.
“How long have I been asleep for?” She sits up straight, her eyes filling with panic as she looks around the room and then at her brother.
“Not long enough.” I touch her shoulder. “You need to eat and get a proper night's sleep. Come on, I’ll take you home and bring you back right after you rest.”
Indie’s eyes widen. “I’m not leaving him.”
“You have the best doctors and nurses in Boston caring for him. If he wakes, they’ll call me, and I will bring you straight back. You are exhausted and need sleep. If not that, you at least need a shower.”
I can see the trepidation in her eyes. See the sadness that has long made its home there. Her eyes settle on my suit.
“You're going into the office today?” She diverts my question.
“It’s Monday,” I remind her.
“Oh.” She looks at me dazed and a little embarrassed that she didn't know what day it was. “You have the Garrison case in court this afternoon.”
“I do.” I smile at her. Even with the lack of sleep and her concern for Austin, she remembers my schedule.
“The papers you need are in the blue file on your desk.”
I take her in for a long moment, this beautiful tragic woman. “Thank you.”
“I’m sorry,” she says, her eyes softening.
“What could you possibly have to be sorry for?”
“Not being at work today. I feel terrible for leaving you short staffed.”
I lean down and kiss her forehead. She leans into me as I stroke her shoulder and back.
“Sweetheart, you take as much time as you need. I have a temp starting today to help out. Besides, I think we may need to reassess our little arrangement, given the change in circumstances.”
Her head swings up in my direction, panic again in her eyes. “What?”
“Not like that,” I reassure her. “I’m not firing you.” I chuckle. I can’t help myself; she looks so damn cute looking at me like that. “I’m just saying, we probably need to talk about things and make some changes, given that you’ve now shared my bed. Maybe I could promote you to that personal assistant status you thought about on your first day.” I wink at her, and she scowls at me. “Sorry, bad timing.” Her face softens again at my apology.
“Sorry, I know we need to talk about everything, but can I just deal with this first.” She looks to Austin and back to me. “I don’t think I have the energy to hash over our relationship status at the moment.”
I trail my thumb down the side of her cheek. “Whenever you're ready. Just know I don’t regret a single moment, and I want that again and more with you.”
She doesn’t respond. She just looks at me, her glorious mind pondering my words.
“I’ll come back when court is finished this afternoon. Call me if you need anything.”
“Okay, thank you,” she says softly, looking back at me with those sad baby blues. My heart breaks seeing her like this. I’ve been able to fix all of Indie’s problems until now. I can’t fix Austin. Sure, I can pay for all his medical expenses, but I’m no doctor and no miracle maker. There’s nothing I can do but watch her suffer, and it’s killing me. I hate that I can’t take her pain away.
