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“I’m right here.” Her cheeks were flushed as she came from the hallway and headed straight for me. “And please answer Larry’s question.”
“We’re going outside,” Larry said, and proceeded to grab Rose’s sleeve and drag her out onto the balcony. I watched them bump into each other and wondered what the hell I’d missed.
She couldn’t bethatupset, could she?
As soon as they went outside, it felt heavy and quiet in the apartment. Sophie glared at me, her chin raised and her eyes narrowed behind those glasses.
I said, “I brought you champa—”
“Did you warn your ex?”
I sighed and shifted my weight to one foot, still confused. “It’s not quite that melodramatic, Soph. I just gave her a heads-up that—”
“How could you do that?” she asked, and her voice was loud and pissed. “Igot the job, I took the job, and I was going to discreetlydothe job—the way we’ve always done it, to help someone out. I cannot believe you just went behind my back and spilled everything toLilifuckingbeth.”
What the hell was that?I searched her face for a clue as I said, “I told you I couldn’t—”
“But why couldn’t you?” She pushed her hair out of her face and said, “Why the hell couldn’t you just live your life without reconnecting with her? It’s not normal, Max, that you’d feel soprotective of yourexthat you’d move heaven and earth to save her, regardless of what everyone else wanted.”
I didn’t know what to say, becauseholy shit, her anger seemed misplaced.
The things she was ranting about made her sound almost... jealous,which couldn’t be the case.
Could it?
I felt a little jittery as I looked into her eyes and told her the truth. “I’m sorry, Soph, but I just couldn’t hurt her like that.”
“But you were fine with hurting me,” she said, and her voice was tight.
I hurt her.If going to Lili had hurt her, that meant Sophie cared. Didn’t it? I stepped closer, my heart pounding as I said quietly, “Soph, did I hurt you?”
Her eyes were on mine, just holding for a minute, and I couldn’t stop myself from tucking her hair behind her ears as we watched each other.
And then I watched her realize what she’d said.
A wrinkle formed between her eyebrows as I watched her realize that it might be true.
Her eyes darted everywhere and she blinked fast, her thoughts running wild, and she gave her head a little shake. “No.”
“It’s okay,” I said, desperate to reassure her. I held up my hands and said, “Just because you might feel something—”
“I don’t,” she interrupted, stepping back from me.
“But if you do,” I said calmly, “that doesn’t mean anything—”
“I don’t, okay, Max?” she snapped, her eyes panicked like a trapped animal. “I don’t.”
I swallowed and decided to burn down the world with the next words I spoke. “Well, I do.”
She inhaled sharply, and one of her hands came to her throat. “No, you don’t.”
“Damn it, Sophie, I do. I’m crazy about you, but that doesn’t mean things between us have to—”
“There is no ‘between us,’ ” she said in disgust, looking everywhere but my face. “God, Max, I told you I didn’t want this.”
“I didn’t, either, but it’s here.” I clenched my jaw as emotion slammed into me, as every feeling I’d ever felt for her decided to make itself known at that very second. “I fought it hard, because trust me, this is the last thing I want. But now you consume me, Soph, every single part of me, and Ilikeit. I can’t drive without thinking about your impractical car, can’t run without thinking about the wayyourun, can’t put on a fucking hard hat without picturing the way you looked in that stupid yellow hat. Somehow you’ve become my center, and God help me, it feels right.”
“No,” she whispered, not even to me but to herself, and a tear escaped from the corner of her eye. I waited, waited even longer as my heart raced.
