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CHAPTER ONE
Doug stood outside his LT’s door, his fist raised to knock, but… He really wasn’t sure about this. He’d never asked a female for help. Never. But this was so important; more important than his own screwed-up feelings. He needed to man-up and knock on the freaking door for God’s sake.
I can do this.
Doug took a deep breath, and before he could talk himself out of it, lowered his knuckles and rapped.
The house wasn’t large. It took only a minute before his squad leader, Talia, opened the door.
“Doug.”
He could see the puzzlement on her face because…Yeah.He hadn’t exactly been a team player on their Downeast SWAT contingent, or even one to have ever sought her out, solo, for input or advice. But now…
“LT,” Doug began tentatively. “Can I…” He made a gesture toward the living room he knew stood just inside the portal.
Talia backed up and held the door wide, a small disbelieving smile coming to her lips. “Come in. Come in.” She probably thought he was here for some kind of “come to God” moment. But, well, that wasn’t happening. This call was completelyunrelated to his SWAT job, and he hoped that Talia would keep an open mind over what he was about to propose. One way or another, Doug knew she’d be honest with him, making her determination on what he had to say once he’d said his piece.
Doug gingerly walked inside, and Talia closed the door behind him, congenially asking, “Would you like some coffee? Fleet put on a pot.”
Fleet Eggers was Talia’s fiancé; soon to be, husband. A wedding with the entire SWAT team in attendance was tentatively scheduled for the following month of May. Doug’s buddy Kyle had already taken the leap with his girl, Rowan. Mason and Everlee had, too. SWAT members were falling like dominos. Doug, however, had serious doubts he’d ever be part of that game. He’d thought maybe he had something going with Talia’s sister, Pixie, but…
Shit.
That’s probably what the LT thought he was here for. To discuss her sister. Dammit all to hell. Why hadn’t he planned for that? This impromptu meeting could get awkward. What had he been thinking?
Oh. Right.That he needed a cop who was a female to help him? That Talia was the only woman he knew in the ranks who would actually speak to him?
“Yeah. Coffee would be good.” He finally answered the LT’s question.
How long she’d been standing, waiting for an answer, Doug couldn’t say, because he’d been stuck in his own head…or up his own ass as his few friends would chide him.
Whatever.
“Have a seat. I’ll be right back. Fleet went to the studio early this morning. Some kind of band dust-up he has to mediate.”
Doug knew next to nothing about the recording business that Talia’s husband was involved with, and he didn’t envy the man.In Doug’s experience, artistic types were not to be trusted. They were self-serving and volatile.
Having come to know Fleet, however, Doug gave the man props. He was a regular, upstanding guy, and obviously made the LT happy. It wouldn’t mean he and Doug would ever be besties or anything, but they could hold a conversation without Doug wanting to walk the fuck away like he did with the majority of people outside his law enforcement comfort zone.
“Black, right?” Talia called from the kitchen.
Once again, Doug had to force himself out of his own thoughts to pay attention. “Yeah. Black.”
When Talia came back into the room holding two mugs, handed him his, then took a seat and looked at him expectantly, Doug floundered a little. Where did he begin?
“Relax, Doug.” Talia attempted to calm him. “I know whatever dragged you here, it has to be important. So just to be clear, no matter what you say to me, it won’t be repeated outside these walls.”
Which meant she’d tell Fleet, but no one else. Doug had expected that. He’d witnessed how a healthy husband/wife relationship worked after living with his uncle and aunt from the time he was fourteen until he was twenty-two. They’d seen him through some really rough patches, but because of their support, he’d eventually found his footing, and post-college began working for the Orono Police Department. For the past eleven years he’d lived in an apartment of his own, but had recently purchased a small, seasonal cottage on a lake in Newport, just over a half-hour drive from his OPD job. It needed work to make it habitable year-round, but he’d already begun chipping away at it, and he couldn’t wait to move in, full time.
Once again, Doug forced himself to focus on the here and now; something he often found difficult. He’d learned from his therapy sessions that he used his internalization into thoughts todisappear from what was actually happening in front of him. His therapist assured him it wasn’t bad. It was a defense mechanism Doug had employed during the dark days of his youth, one that had carried over into his adult life. Now, however, it had morphed a bit. He disassociated—or dropped out—to instantly analyze a conversation or situation in which he found himself. He tended to pull apart physical as well as intellectual data until it was beyond dead, which often kept him from enjoying things for the sake of, well, enjoyment.
But right now…
“I need your help,” Doug spit out.
Talia didn’t even blink. “Name it.”
Doug was ready to reveal a part of his life not many knew about. Talia would be blindsided.
